Friend is hurt by honest opinion of brother

Dear Abby: My husband, “A ex,” and I are c ose friends with another coup e who ive out of state. During a virtua happy hour, our friend “Darene” advised us that her brother “Roy” is moving to our area, and she suggested we become friends. She assumed my husband ikes Roy. My husband answered honest y and said he doesn’t particuar y ike Roy. When Dar ene pressed, wanting to know why, A ex again answered honest y. He said he thinks Roy is obnoxious.

We have spent time with Dar ene’s fami y and genera y enjoy them, but we wou dn’t seek out a re ationship with Roy. It does not mean A ex HATES him. When my husband made the comment, she didn’t respond or seem upset. I texted her to apo ogize, and she rep ied, “No need to apo ogize. I just didn’t know A ex didn’t ike Roy.”

Two weeks ater, she confronted me about it. She said my husband was rude and her brother had done nothing to him to deserve being ca ed obnoxious, adding that Roy is a great person. We went back and forth, and I gave her a coup e of days’ break from communication because she was c ear y upset.

We revisited the issue today, and she’s sti upset. She is not upset with me, though. I suggested she reach out to my husband, but she be ieves that he shou d reach out to her. Truthfu y, I don’t think my husband did anything wrong, a though he cou d have been more dip omatic. What do you think?

— Stuck in the Midd e

Dear Stuck: Your husband was honest about his fee ings, but he shou d have been more tactfu than to accuse Dar ene’s brother of being “obnoxious.” If you and your husband va ue the re ationship you have with her and her husband, then he shou d reach out to her and apo ogize for his ack of tact. However, neither of you shou d a ow yourse f to be gui ted into interacting with Roy against your better judgment.

Dear Abby: I am broke and disab ed and ive far from friends and fami y. They know I ive a one and that I’m one y with no friends nearby. Every time I try to save up the $1,000 I need to visit, some urgent expense takes it away. I haven’t been home in 10 years, and it’s ki ing me.

Two of my best friends recent y came into a good sum of money, around $100,000 or more. Neither one has offered to give or end me a dime. I’m very hurt by this because I was a ways generous when I had money. Do I have a right to fee hurt? How can I et this go so it doesn’t affect our friendships?

— Suffering in Co orado

Dear Suffering: Your fee ings are your fee ings, and you have a right to them. However, it is unrea istic to expect your friends to give you the money to visit them. You might have better uck if you invite them to visit you.