San Francisco Chronicle - (Sunday)
Moms are on quest for more child-friendly S.F.
They’re encouraging places to add spaces for parents and kids
Everyone knows the saying, “It takes a village to raise a child.”
But in an urban environment like San Francisco, parents can struggle to build their village. That’s especially true as it’s a city of transplants, who may lack local family or friend networks. And those problems are exacerbated by San Francisco’s status as the country’s mostchildless major city, with just 13% of the population under 18.
Two moms are joining forces to try to make San Francisco more kid-friendly, starting by encouraging local institutions to add infrastructure — children’s play areas and diaper-changing tables — to encourage parents to congregate with kids in tow. Joyful Parenting SF is also holding regular meetups for young families.
“Parenting can be really isolating,” said Ruth Grace Wong, who started Joyful Parenting SF with her friend Émeline Brulé. “It would be great if there were more kids’ spaces within adult spaces, so parents and children could be more integrated into civic and social life.”
While she appreciates the city’s bounty of parks and playgrounds, outdoor areas are not always conducive to parents spending time together, said Wong, a software engineer now on maternity leave with her newborn daughter. (She also has two toddler boys, ages 4 and 2.)
The pandemic made finding friends as a new mom a lot harder, said Brulé, an academic researcher whose son is 10 months old.
“Soon after Orion was born, I realized that a lot of places that used to provide community for families were either not open since COVID or open only two hours one day a week,” Brulé said. “There are very few spaces where you can just drop in (with babies or toddlers) and not have
to pay for it. Joyful Parenting is trying to address that by creating infrastructure that is public, open and community-oriented for parents and kids.”
Case in point: diaper changing tables. Although both state law and a San Francisco ordinance mandate that stores, restaurants and movie theaters offer baby-changing accommodations that are accessible to all genders, in practice, not every establishment does, Wong said. Joyful Parenting SF’s website offers a template for parents to ask local shops and cafes to add changing tables.
“Once a parent realizes they can ask their favorite place for a diaper changing place, they’re like, ‘What else can I do to make life easier? ’ ” she said. “That’s the gateway.”
Safe, indoor areas for kids are another priority.
“If you’re trying to work on a project, or have a conversation with someone, it can be pretty hard to do with kids unless they also have something to do, an area where they can be safe and play,” Brulé said.
Wong and Brulé are asking local spaces such as cafes, maker spaces and co-working spaces to add a simple area for kids under 5, with an enclosure, such as a baby gate or play fence, to keep them from wandering; and simple cooperative toys, such as blocks. Being able to easily clean the area and toys is key.
“It’s not something that requires a huge amount of money,” Brulé said.
Manny’s, a hybrid space in the Mission that combines a cafe with community events and a political bookshop, responded to the women’s request by adding a huge playpen with balls and other toys in its homey back room amid the eclectic assortment of plush furniture and pillows. A dozen or so parents with young kids meet there on Thursday mornings, catching up with each other as the toddlers interact.
When Joyful Parenting SF “contacted us, it felt like a great opportunity to extend this space to people of all ages,” said Caleb Hilladakis, special projects coordinator at Manny’s. “And there’s a certain joy that comes from having them here. I love walking back there and just getting to know the beauty of young childhood and the fun that they have.”
Noisebridge, a makers’ space in the Mission, likewise added an area with bins of toys and art supplies for kids of all ages.
“Parents can come with their children (who can) explore their own creativity and let parents have their space to explore too,” said Liz Henry, Noisebridge secretary.
Crucially, there is also a barrier to keep kids from roaming too freely.
“A lot is messy or dangerous; there is an enormous table saw that can cut you in half,” Henry said. “I love the idea that we are making the space friendly for kids who want to explore in what might not be the world’s safest, most sanitized environment.”
The two founders hope that within a year there will be an indoor children’s play area embedded in a local space in every neighborhood in the city.
“A lot of places do want to be more kid-friendly, more familyfriendly and more accessible,” Wong said. “They just need a little advice.”