Life Tributes Richard Wilmington

May 30, 1939 - December 13, 2023

Richard Newton Wilmington “Dick”, 84, passed away peacefully at home in San Francisco, after a remarkable lifetime filled with love, laughter, professional success and travel. He was an avid explorer, writer and reader, always eager for new experiences. Dick had a broad world view that shaped his interactions with — and contributions to — everything around him.

He was born in Scarsdale, N.Y., where he lived with his mother, Muriel Babcock; father, Edward Newton Wilmington; and sisters, Ann and Joyce. He graduated from Hobart College in 1961 and worked for four years in Children’s Protective Services in Westchester County, and went on to earn a Master’s Degree in Theology at the General Theological Seminary of the Episcopal Church in Manhattan. He was married in 1962 to Sally Cushenbery, who was his best friend in college.

In 1965, they moved to Marin County, Calif., for his first assignment as an Episcopal priest, just weeks after the birth of their first child. He began serving at St. John’s Episcopal Church in Ross, continued as Vicar of St. Augustine’s in Fairfax, and next served as pastor with the UCC congregation, before moving in 1970 to Grace Cathedral in San Francisco as Canon Pastor. He and Sally had three wonderful children, Allison, Leslie and Benjamin.

In 1979, after a new Dean at Grace Cathedral decided on some changes, Richard decided to pursue a markedly different career path, first getting a contractor’s license, then a Real Estate license. He moved into residential real estate in the East Bay. With a partner, he launched SolomonWilmington & Associates in 1984, a premier realty firm in Orinda, Calif. He was a highly successful owner/ realtor until 1996, when he decided to take early retirement.

Throughout both of his primary careers, Richard was known for his exemplary work ethic, integrity, social justice involvement and bringing the best of himself to everything he did.

Finally, Richard was deeply devoted to his beloved spouse, Robert Lilley “Bob”; his children; grandchildren; and the extended Lilley family. He and Bob met in 1972, and after being together for 36 years, were finally able to marry in 2008 with the entire family in joyful attendance at City Hall. Their extraordinary union, nearly 50 years together, continues to serve as a shining example of what a lifetime romantic relationship should look like.

Tragically, he lost Bob in 2015, but not before they had visited 93 countries on six continents!

He is survived by his sister, Joyce Cardile; his children, Allison Houston, Leslie Wilmington and Ben Wilmington; his grandchildren, Sage Houston, Rune Houston and Lorenzo Wilmington; and the many Lilley family members who hold a very special place in his heart.

Richard will be remembered for his quick wit, dry sense of humor, ever-present curiosity for the world around him, being a lifelong learner, teacher, explorer and fitness fiend, and above all, for his unwavering love for his friends and family, especially Bob. His final days were marked by literally hundreds of phone calls, emails, texts and letters from around the country, letting him know how deeply he had touched the lives of those around him. He will be missed more deeply than words can convey.

A celebration of his life is being planned for the first half of January at the San Francisco Towers. In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to the ACLU or Planned Parenthood in his memory.