We need conversations, not apologies

Mark Stone has apologized after witnesses say he used a racial slur at Cornology, the gourmet popcorn shop in Emeryville.

Witnesses said he shouted “n—s” at a group of black juveniles in his store Sunday. “I have great remorse and much regret in the way I reacted to a robbery taking place in the store on Sunday,” Stone, the company’s founder, said to me in an email Wednesday afternoon. “I reacted unprofessionally in the heat & extreme stress of the moment. For that I seek forgiveness from GOD, my family and friends.”

What Stone describes as a robbery, witnesses say was merely 10 black juveniles entering the store, their presence setting off Stone.

What’s more, Stone, in his initial interview with my colleague Justin Phillips, said an employee used the racial slur. But there was no employee, only him, the CEO of Cornology, a public official later told Phillips.

This won’t go away because Stone is sorry.

This is something the community has to talk about, because that’s the only way to eradicate racism.

Yes, even the Bay Area, home to the Free Speech Movement and progressive politics, isn’t immune to racism, because structural and institutional racism is sewn into the fabric of America like stars in a flag.

Here’s what I know about the experience of being black in America: It means at times living in fear that your life may be cut short because of the color of your skin.

This country’s prosperous foundation was forged by the labor of millions of black slaves, which means this country won’t be relieved of its demons until racism is something that can be discussed openly in schools, offices and, of course, coffee shops.

Racism exists because some people are afraid to confront it.

Some people would rather confront a black man at a coffee shop than confront the reasons why seeing a black man at a coffee shop could make someone uncomfortable.

The Cornology incident follows the abrupt closing on Friday of Elmwood Cafe, a Berkeley coffee shop, after an old controversy was revived, dragging the business into the current conversations about racial bias.

In 2015, W. Kamau Bell, a black Bay Area comedian and CNN host, was told to leave the cafe after an employee suspected he was bothering four white women seated at an outdoor cafe table.

One of the women happened to be his wife.

Three years later, he was reminded of the incident when Starbucks announced the closing of more than 8,000 stores across the nation for a day of racial-bias education for its employees after a Starbucks employee at a Philadelphia location called police on two black men who were sitting at a table waiting for an acquaintance to arrive.

Some have criticized Bell for rekindling the Elmwood Cafe story. Bell said that the cafe’s owner, Michael Pearce, promised a wide-reaching education campaign, but Pearce didn’t follow through.

Bell was right to talk about his experience then — and now. He has the platform to speak truth to power. I believe Bell, a nationally known personality, is obligated to speak for the black men who get harassed, assaulted, arrested and killed just for being black.

“I wasn’t speaking out for me — me and my family will be fine,” Bell told me during an interview Wednesday. “I was speaking out for people who don’t have the platform to speak out. I just know if it’s happening to me, it’s happening to other people and those who don’t have a platform.”

I went to Elmwood Cafe Tuesday night. Peering inside the cafe’s window, I could see the stacked chairs once used for outdoor seating. There were blue and yellow Post-it notes on the cafe’s doors, covered in butcher paper. Riley Byrne and Meghan O’Connell, both juniors at UC Berkeley, stopped to read the messages on their way home following an evening run.

“So unfair — you did so much good and that should be recognized. Please reopen!” read one Post-it note.

“Closing down is the wrong response,” another message read. “Talking and listening is a much better one.”

I asked Byrne and O’Connell, who are white, if I could ask them questions. We ended up having a conversation about race, the kind of dialogue Bell was seeking.

“I mean, if it’s us, we’re both white women coming here, we can be like, ‘Yeah, it’s not racist,’ ” Byrne, 22, said. “We’re not experiencing anything.”

“People like to be comfortable. This was their spot. It’s easier not to have that discussion,” O’Connell, 21, said.

It’s so easy to disregard the experiences of people of color who’ve felt the lashes of discrimination and racism.

“No one wants to acknowledge that they have these prejudices, and no one wants to talk about that, ‘Oh, this could happen in our community,’ ” Byrne said. “Because then you actually have to face the fact that something’s wrong in the community.”

And something is wrong. Cornology was open for business at 10 a.m. Wednesday, and the smell of fresh popcorn wafted out of the store’s open door.

What’s the penalty, if any, for making racist statements?

“Being racist doesn’t shut businesses down in America,” Bell said. “In fact, it’s helped build many businesses in America.”

That’s why saying sorry isn’t enough.