‘Toy Story’ knockoff is perfectly dreadful
You’ve just turned 10 years old, and for your birthday your parents take you to see the new animated film “UglyDolls.” And you hate it.
Congratulations, kid. You’re progressing right along, on track to your teenage years and beyond to adult wisdom.
“UglyDolls” is a mindnumbing, low-rent version of “Toy Story,” with saccharine songs and a plot with echoes of, no kidding, the Holocaust. If you’re under 10, you might like it.
Based on the plush toys, the film includes the voices of Kelly Clarkson, Janelle Monáe, Nick Jonas, Pitbull, Blake Shelton and Wanda Sykes. It is directed by Kelly Asbury, whose work includes “Shrek 2” and “Gnomeo & Juliet.”
The plot: A land full of toys dreaming of finding a home with human kids is divided between the slums of Uglyville, populated by strangely shaped plush toys, and the Institute of Perfection, which churns out what amounts to Ken and Barbie dolls. A pack of UglyDolls, led by Moxie (Clarkson), searches for a path to a human home and stumbles into the Institute of Perfection, which is led by the Aryan-looking brat Lou (Jonas).
Lou, whose motto is “pretty makes perfect,” is looked upon as some sort of god by the community of budding frat boys and Stepford wives. His mission is to gaslight the UglyDolls into self-worthlessness because they are different. When the UglyDolls persist in their dreams, Lou raises the specter of ethnic cleansing by threatening them with “recycling” — that is, death.
There is even a scene of the UglyDolls forming a human chain to avoid the incinerator, a blatant rip-off of the incinerator scene in “Toy Story 3.”
The UglyDolls are helped by Wanda, an acolyte of Lou who begins to sense that she is not perfect and, through Moxie’s indefatigable optimism, starts to find her true self.
The songs are without distinction — the kind of plastic music and lyrics you might find on the Disney Channel. Even a cover of Hall & Oates’ “You Make My Dreams” is mashed into obsequiousness.
Earlier, it was mentioned that kids under 10 might like it. Yes, there is a positive message about not judging people by their looks and realizing your own self-worth even if you are different. Check. But I must report that in the kiddie-packed screening I went to, there was crying. Not by me, although one can sympathize.