A Valentine’s batch of overheard comments on the topic of love.
Presidents come and go, flowers bloom and wilt, but love lasts forever. And conversations about love are heartfelt blahblahblah and “then he said to me …”
This year’s Valentine’s overheards, as always, are true accounts of sometimes notsotrue love, arranged herein in the chronological order of romance.
Start your engines
“It’s easy to find a dude. They’re all over. What’s hard to find is a man.”
— Customer to checker at grocery store, overheard by Jerry Przybylski
“My type? I like funny guys. But they have to have my sense of humor.”
— Young woman to young woman, overheard on BART by Michael Gray
Sister, 9: “I know she’s your girlfriend!”
Brother, 6: “Naah. I just chase her a lot.”
— Conversation at family dinner in Napa, overheard by Joseph Pramuk
Girl, 6, to her mother: “So Jason wants you to be his girlfriend, but you don’t like him that way. You want Mark to be your boyfriend, but he doesn’t like you that way. Is that how it goes?”
Mother: “Yeah. That’s why we call it ‘The Love Puzzle.’ ”
— Conversation during car trip on way to a wedding, overheard by Leah Fortin
Proceed with caution
“Never refer to a woman as sturdy.”
— Son giving his father dating advice, overheard at Denny’s in South San Francisco by Bree LeMaire
“A man bun is a big red flag.”
— Woman to woman, overheard in line at Arizmendi on Irving by Adda Dada
“He fancies himself a heterosexual.”
— Middleaged woman to man, overheard by Mike Pincus
Testing, testing. 1, 2, 3, 4
Woman one: “How did the date go?”
Woman two: “She’s out buying new underwear.”
— Conversation near Museum of the City of New York, overheard by Nancy Pietrafesa
“I lost my virginity there. Well, my normal virginity anyway.”
— Man to woman, overheard in front of the Ferry Building by Dan Reich
Man one: “He looks good.
Does he go to the gym?”
Man two: “Only between husbands.”
— Man to man on Castro Street, overheard by Mark Abramson
Older man: “It’s not in my DNA to buy a Lamborghini and take up with a 19yearold.”
Second older man: “Bob, you can rent both of those.”
— Overheard in a g ym in Walnut Creek by William Raffetto
Wedding bells go clunk
“Well yes, I have had several husbands, it’s just that none of them were mine.”
— Woman at Boston Logan International Airport, overheard by Bill Baker
Passenger: “Good morning. May you have a happy life and a happy wife.”
Driver: “Too late.”
— Friendly man boarding 45Union/Stockton bus, overheard by Melissa MacWilliams
“She wants to move in with me and have a baby, even though we hardly know each other. Who does she think I am, Charlie Manson?”
— Man to man, overheard on Cole Street in San Francisco by Steve Heilig
“I am looking for my insignificant other.”
— Woman at 16th and Mission streets in San Francisco, overheard by Stephen Vincent
“I’m the most logical person you ever married.”
— Man in San Anselmo coffee shop, overheard by Joe Wahnsiedler
Special cases
“I can (make love to) myself better than he can. But he does take good care of my dogs.”
— Youngish woman to youngish woman at Paradiso in San Leandro, overheard by Robin Richardson
“One of us is crazy. And it’s not me … and it’s not you.”
— Woman to man, overheard at Poppi’s Anatolia restaurant in Eugene, Ore., by Bill Prince
“Remember that cute guy I met last week? After I told him I’m registered as independent, he said he can work it out with me.”
— Woman to woman, overheard on BART by Oliver Hernando
“The only thing he’s getting out of hanging out with her is the 4cent returns from her empty vodka bottles.”
— Man at Caffe Trieste in San Francisco, overheard by Andre Hunt
“No, I didn’t sleep with him. Yeah, I totally agree he’s gorgeous and we’re totally compatible. I just don’t like him.”
— Young man on cell phone, overheard near 18th and Castro streets in San Francisco by Mark Hetts