Giving kids tools to think about gender
Like last year, San Francisco did without its famed Pride Parade up Market Street — yet another casualty of COVID19. But June is about more than LGBTQ marchers and floats. It’s also the catalyst for discussion about emerging ideas around gender assignment, roles, identity and expression, as well as sexual orientation.
The fact of the matter is that such ideas, though cheered by many, also evoke discomfort and even controversy in some places. Think about genderinclusive bathrooms; public discourse is often loud and fractious.
Even little kids catch the drift of what’s being said. And even little kids are experiencing social and cultural changes around gender. Here are six recent books to help them negotiate shifting ground.
Being You: A First Conversation About Gender
Written by Megan Madison and Jessica Ralli; illustrated by Anne/Andy Passchier (Rise x Penguin Workshop; 36 pages; $8.99; ages 2-5)
Start them young. That is the mission of this upbeat board book aimed at introducing body parts, nonbinary options, pronouns, patriarchy, feminism and activism, all with the goal of just “being ourselves.” Sounds pretty weighty, but simple language makes these basic concepts accessible even to toddlers. Woke adults can read aloud the respectfully straightforward narrative, no furry bunnies or fuzzy bears needed as a hook. With a clear agenda, the back matter gives parents, teachers and caregivers historical background and suggestions for best practices: Provide varied options for dressup, reflect on gender identities at the dinner table, and brainstorm ways to promote social justice. (An earlier companion book focuses on race.)
Born Ready: The True Story of a Boy Named Penelope
Written by Jodie Patterson; illustrated by Charnell Pinkney-Barlow (Crown; 40 pages; $20.99; ages 4-8)
The Black transgender kid on the cover is grinning wide. Drawing on her own adult memoir, a loving mom explains why. In this true story, the cover’s Penelope moves from being a girl who likes “skateboards and hightops, baggy blue jeans and button front shirts, math, science, and getting straight A’s” to being a boy who likes the same things but finally feels at peace. No more acting out or anger. The smooth transition might seem idealized, but credit is given to a supportive family, accepting classmates and one dedicated karate teacher. His philosophy: Winners are losers who get up. Digital art is more energetic than pensive, still allowing themes of trust, authenticity and empowerment to come through.
Fred Gets Dressed
Written and illustrated by Peter Brown (Little, Brown; 48 pages; $18.99; ages 3-6)
“Fred is naked.” Now there’s a great opening line! In this spirited picture book, Fred romps through the house wild and free before landing in his parents’ closet. There he tries on Dad’s attire. Drab and too hard to get on. Then he moves on to Mom’s.
Definitely more exciting, especially with jewelry and makeup. Enter Fred’s parents for a tense moment of reckoning that quickly turns to family fun. Peppered with hot pink, the browntone art captures a joyous boy, whether wearing nothing at all or playing dressup. With no hidden message, this happy story elevates parents for understanding the importance of childhood play.
What Are Your Words? A Book About Pronouns
Written by Katherine Locke; illustrated by Anne Passchier
(Little, Brown; 40 pages; $17.99; ages 4-8)
Language is constantly changing, a fact underscored in this primer on pronouns. Of late, big changes revolve around gender and the use of he/she, him/her and new neutrals like ze/zir. At the outset, the young narrator announces, “Uncle Lior is coming to visit today. I can’t wait to show them around my neighborhood.” There’s no confusion about using the plural “them” as a singular. Cheery art follows as Ari then walks to a local summer bash and considers how his diverse neighbors also exercise different pronoun options. Wrestling with what to choose, Ari announces, “My pronouns are like the weather. They change depending on how I feel.” That’s flexibility.
My Rainbow
Written by Trinity Neal and DeShanna Neal; illustrated by Art Twink (Kolika; 32 pages; $17.99; ages 4-8)
Trinity is a Black, transgender girl with autism, considered by her family to be a “masterpiece” and “a beautiful rainbow.” But for Trinity, something is missing. As she explains to her mother, “People don’t care if cisgender girls like you have short hair. But it’s different for transgender girls. I need long hair.” Drawing on reallife experience, a mother and daughter cowrite the rest of the story. Key elements include a sympathetic mom, a helpful brother and a handy wig store with a big selection but nothing quite right. Mom spends a late night over a sewing machine with multicolor strands to achieve a “just right” creation. Vibrant and boldly outlined, the art adds both detail and emotion to this candid celebration of selfexpression.
Mayor Pete: The Story of Pete Buttigieg
Written by Rob Sanders; illustrated by Levi Hastings (Henry Holt; 48 pages; $19.99; ages 4-8)
In 2019, Pete Buttigieg became the first openly gay candidate for the Democratic nomination for president. He had come out only four years before and married shortly thereafter, facts neatly tucked into this admiring picture biography. Subdued and realistic, the digital art helps cover a life still unfolding: a boyhood of big dreams in South Bend, Ind.; higher education at Harvard and Oxford; postgraduate jobs in business and the Navy Reserve in Afghanistan; a pivot to government as hometown mayor; and finally, a presidential run. Throughout this friendly account, both personal and political, emphasis is on losses and wins in Buttigieg’s increasingly ambitious bids for leadership. The recurring refrain throughout the book: “Only time will tell who Mayor Pete becomes.”
Susan Faust is a member of the Association for Library Service to Children, most recently serving on the 2018 Children’s Literature Legacy Award selection committee. She was a librarian at Katherine Delmar Burke School in San Francisco for 33 years.