Hate for comics turns part­ner off

Santa Fe New Mexican - - TIME OUT -

Dear An­nie: I’ve been see­ing this woman for about a month. She is beau­ti­ful and smart and thinks I’m funny, which is a plus. It’s been getting more se­ri­ous. But re­cently, when we were try­ing to de­cide which movie to see, some new info came to light. It turns out she hates su­per­hero movies and comic books. This is a to­tal turnoff to me, to the point that I now think this re­la­tion­ship may be doomed. I just see it as sort of a lit­mus test for per­sonal com­pat­i­bil­ity. Should I end things now be­fore I get deeper, or am I be­ing petty? — Marvel Mega-Fan

Dear Marvel Mega-Fan: Tastes don’t make or break a re­la­tion­ship. It can def­i­nitely help to have shared hob­bies, but shared hob­bies alone can’t form the be­drock of a se­ri­ous ro­man­tic re­la­tion­ship. Shared val­ues do. And mu­tual re­spect. And oh, yes, love. All that is to say yes, it does seem a bit petty to me to break up with her over this, but deal break­ers are in the eye of the holder. Plus, this sort of thing is also a self-ful­fill­ing prophecy. This re­la­tion­ship may now be doomed, but only be­cause you’ve de­cided it may be, not be­cause she doesn’t like Spi­der-Man.

Dear An­nie: What is the proper amount to tip a hair­dresser? Re­cently, I saw some­thing in a mag­a­zine that said I should be tip­ping my hair­dresser 20 per­cent and tip­ping the sham­poo girl or boy (if there is one) an ad­di­tional $5! I get my hair done once a month, so that would re­ally start to add up. What is the eti­quette? — Salon-Goer in Shreve­port

Dear Salon-Goer: Twenty per­cent is a fair tip for some­one with whom you’re en­trust­ing your crown­ing glory. As for tip­ping as­sis­tants, prof­fer­ing at least a small tip is usu­ally ap­pro­pri­ate, es­pe­cially if they’ve been more hands-on.

Dear An­nie: I must ad­dress the let­ter from the Viet­nam vet­eran who will not call for help. First, he should not give up. The Veter­ans Cri­sis Line (https://www.vet­er­an­scri­sis­line.net) is 800-273-8255. In 2016, 58.1 per­cent of vet­eran sui­cides were among veter­ans 55 or older. De­pend­ing on where the vet­eran lives, his county may have a veter­ans ser­vice of­fice he could visit or con­tact. He more than likely has a Veter­ans of For­eign Wars, Dis­abled Amer­i­can Veter­ans and Amer­i­can Le­gion or­ga­ni­za­tion near him that could pro­vide more re­sources. These groups serve veter­ans of all eras, and he could find peo­ple with whom he can re­late. And bring the bud­dies! Please of­fer these op­tions to him. — Wife of a Viet­nam Vet­eran

Dear Wife of a Viet­nam Vet­eran: Thank you so much for this wealth of in­for­ma­tion.

Dear An­nie: I par­tic­i­pated in your study about chil­dren. (I was one of the 77 per­cent of read­ers who are glad they had kids.) It was a very good and valu­able study. One of the re­spon­dents said to “trust your gut,” and you re­ported that peo­ple were mostly happy with their de­ci­sions, which was heart­en­ing. One of my daugh­ters wants chil­dren, and my other one and her hus­band have de­cided not to have them. I won­dered, given my think­ing and ex­pe­ri­ence, whether the one who is not hav­ing kids is set­ting her­self up for dis­ap­point­ment in later life, and know­ing that this is not likely is en­cour­ag­ing to me re­gard­ing her hap­pi­ness. — Phil N.

Dear Phil N.: I’m glad you gleaned some in­sight from the poll re­sults; I know I did, as well. Thanks so much for writ­ing.

Send your ques­tions for An­nie Lane to dear­an­[email protected]­ators.com. To find out more about An­nie Lane and read fea­tures by other Cre­ators Syn­di­cate colum­nists and car­toon­ists, visit the Cre­ators Syn­di­cate web­site at www. cre­ators.com.

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