Wife abuses her medication, straining marriage
Dear Annie: My wife has been on pain medication for almost a decade, and it has turned into a serious addiction.
I have to monitor her pills weekly — though, recently, it’s been daily.
She hasn’t worked at all the last decade, ever since she started getting prescribed the painkillers.
She lays in bed all day long, sleeping or watching TV.
I’ve bought several safes to lock away her pills in so that I can only administer to her what she needs.
She’s broken into all of them. I keep the pills with me at all times so that I can make sure she doesn’t take too much. She’s constantly deriding me, blaming me for her not having enough pills. She always pleads, “Just give me tomorrow’s pills tonight.”
She has now brought our adult children into this mess by trying to make them pick sides in this ongoing fight, but the kids know she has a problem! I have brought up rehab several times, but she dismisses the idea and claims she doesn’t need it.
This past year, I got her an appointment with a therapist.
It was just online, through videoconference, and my wife completely blew it off, barely paying attention to the therapist. After 25 years of marriage, I’m about ready to file for divorce. Help!
— Tired of Mother’s Little Helper
Dear Tired: Of course you’re exhausted. You’re living in the tides of addiction, but you don’t have to be subject to the constant push and pull.
To find some grounding, I strongly encourage you to check out Nar-Anon (www. nar-anon.org) or SMART Recovery Family and Friends (www.smartrecovery.org/ family).
You cannot neglect your own mental health. As for your wife, she clearly has a severe opioid addiction and needs professional help.
You and your adult children may choose to do an intervention in order to make the strongest possible case to get her into an in-patient treatment facility.
She will need the supervision of medical professionals if she’s going to detox.
Call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration at 800-6624357 for guidance and to be referred to resources in your area.
Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com. To find out more about Annie Lane and read features by other Creators Syndicate columnists and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www. creators.com.