Grampo Caralampio’s parents ‘le daban’ drugs

Una noche después de dinner, Canutito estaba sitting en el couch right next de su grampo. Estaban watching

televisión cuando de repente una commercial came on warning a los padres de familia about the dangers of letting their children usar drugs of any kind. Entonces, Canutito turned to his grampo and asked him, “Grampo, do you think that there are any kinds of good drugs?”

“Pus, chur, m’hijo,” Grampo Caralampio replied. “Cuando yo era un little boy, mis parents nos daban all kinds of drugs amíy ami sherman it os .”

“Really, grampo?” Canutito questioned him. “Did your parents really give all kinds of drugs to you and your brothers and sisters?”

“All the time,” grampo replied.

“Y no nos daban drugs because we were good. They used to give us drugs porque we were bad.”

“Your parents must have been very lenient con ustedes, grampo,” the little boy remarked. “It’s a wonder que you didn’t turn out all marijuano, grampo,” he remarked.

“That was exactly la razón que mis hermanitos, y yo didn’t end up todos marijuanos; addicted to drugs,” grampo continued. “It was thanks to the kinds of drugs que our parents gave us.”

“What do you mean con eso, grampo?” Canutito asked him.

“Pues, whenever we were naughty, mis padres had us ‘drug’ out a esa little shed behind the house. If we were too sleepy yno queríamos ir to Mass with them, they still ‘drug’ us out to church instead of letting us dormir .Ifwe said dirty or bad words they ‘drug’ us out pa’l sink y nos hacían wash out our bocas con soap and water.”

“Oh!” Canutito exclaimed. “I am starting to comprender what kinds

de drugs your parents gave you!”

“Sí,” grampo affirmed him, smiling from ear to ear. “Si hacíamos misbehave en la escuela la teacher had us ‘drug’ a la oficina del principal, and if we told our parents, they too had us ‘drug’ to the woodshed donde no daban some more

nalgadas for having been disrespectful a la maéstra.”

“It seems como que you were ‘drug’ all over the place, grampo,”

Canutito remarked.

“Uuu, I was ‘drug’ everywhere,” grampo said. “I was ‘drug’ pa’l

garden in the summer to help deshierbar the weeds. I was ‘drug’ to the corral to help my dad capar los

lambs and drug out feed los marranos. I was ‘drug’ to la leña to bring in enough wood to stoke the estufa pa’las tortillas. I was ‘drug’ into los fields to help put up la pastura in the summer. In the winter I was ‘drug’ to the acequia to break up the ice pa’las vacas so that they could drink agua. I was ‘drug’ to the gallinero to collect los huevos from the chickens at the end of the day, and I was also ‘drug’ outside to clean the ditches para regar the crops.”

“Gee, grampo,” Canutito said, “Your parents really gave you a lot of drugs.”

“And it was because of all of those ‘drugs’ que mis padres gave me que I didn’t ever get messed up con marijuana, o cocaine o crack or todas esas wrong kinds of drugs. Y todas las noches before I fall asleep, le doy gracias a Dios por todas las ‘drugs’ que my parents gave all of us kids.”

Canutito was quiet por un momento and then he said, “I hope que someday I will be able to give my own hijitos those same kinds of ‘drugs’ también.”

“If you really love them entonces you will,” grampo smiled down at him.

Canutito went back to watchando el TV safe in the thought de que su grampo era un

very wise man ...