Too many wrongs to make Dolphins right

“When it was over Sunday, Antonio Brown scored (fill in the blank) touchdowns for the New England Patriots, Minkah Fitzpatrick was traded at (fill in the time) and Bill Belichick said, “(fill in the cliché) …” Oh, sorry. I’m working ahead. I figure if the Miami Dolphins are looking to the future, there’s no reason the rest of us should be trapped in the present. And I get it. As my disclaimer has read from the start: If this gets their franchise quarterback coming up, so be it.

But if Baltimore’s 59-10 win over the Dolphins in the season opener last week showed problems, this Sunday against the Patriots threatens to compound them after the ugliest of work weeks.

Let’s practice some phrases to survive another Dolphins Sunday:

1. I’m still in on this tanking thing if you are.

2. Only 233 shopping days left until Tua Tagovailoa is a Dolphin.

3. Yeah, I guess I will have another cold one.

Here’s all you need to know about this game: Brown makes his first start for the Patriots, and Fitzpatrick might make his last start for the Dolphins.

That isn’t why the Patriots are favored by a near-historic 18 1⁄2 points on the road.

That was happening anyway. Brown and Fitzpatrick merely explain how these two franchises keep chugging along in distinctly separate universes.

In the past week, Brown celebrated his release from Oakland, signed immediately with New England, was slapped with a civil lawsuit alleging rape and hopped on the Patriots plane to play in Miami.

They’re cold and crass that way.

Fitzpatrick, meanwhile, went from being a cornerstone of the rebuilding Dolphins to another example of everything that can go wrong in a season such as this.

A blatant job of roster malpractice was compounded by coaching malfeasance against Baltimore. You are allowed to play a safety deep, right?

Oddly, Fitzpatrick is expected to start Sunday in either an attempt to showcase his talent for scouts or punish him for demanding a trade. More oddly, he isn’t the only player two NFL scouts raised eyebrows at this week.

Typically, injuries are off-limits for second-guessing for obvious reasons. Who knows but the player?

But let’s ask this question about ethics and football: Should players sacrifice aging bodies today for a team focused squarely on tomorrow? Would you?

This isn’t to question, say, Reshad Jones in this context. Jones played half of the snaps last Sunday.

You remember how he dealt last year with not playing all the time — he refused to play at all. Now he’s out with an ankle issue.

Albert Wilson is another matter. He missed much of last season after a hip injury and was one of the success stories to play last Sunday. He played six snaps. He had an apparent calf injury.

But offensive coordinator Chad O’Shea answered a question of Wilson playing so little with an ambiguous, “I think there’s a number of factors that go into that other than the injury, so I’ll just leave it at that.”

OK, then.

What’s certain is Fitzpatrick, Jones and Wilson are among the handful of given talents on a diluted roster. They were expected to help prop up a purposely sagging team with a veneer of respectability. Now they’re evidence of a team in some trouble (untimely injuries) or a lot of trouble (internal problems).

Here come the bloodless Patriots smelling blood too.

There’s a silly thought Dolphins coach and Patriots alum Brian Flores will know some secrets about his old boss Belichick. Well, Belichick is 12-4 against disciples Romeo Crennel, Bill O’Brien, Eric Mangini, Josh McDaniels and Matt Patricia.

Flores would need the football version of the theory of relativity to counterbalance the talent discrepancy on these teams. The real question for anyone wanting to test the point spread is whether Belichick will have some mercy.

There hasn’t been a higher point spread favoring a road team in 40 years. Then again, if you like long shots, the Dolphins are your team: They dropped from a 500-to-1 shot at the Super Bowl last Sunday to 10,000-to-1.

Yeah, have another cold one.

I’ll just sit here and fill in the blanks to this Sunday’s story.