Couple decline co-worker’s friendship

Dear Readers: Because of syndication scheduling, I write and submit my columns two weeks in advance of publication. Due to this time lag, the Q&A’s will not reflect the latest information about the worldwide COVID-19 pandemic we are currently facing.

Dear Amy: A former coworker has moved into my area and wants to have a friendly relationship with my husband and me.

We had lunch one time and my husband and I were uncomfortable with the conversation.

Politically, this person is very conservative and vocal.

We are not.

We have had no contact for many months until yesterday when I received an email saying they would like to get together “sooner rather than later.”

How can I tactfully decline and not hurt their feelings?

Wondering

Dear Wondering: Many months after seeing you one time, this person has reached out and expressed the desire to get together at some point. They are not issuing a specific invitation or even asking a question, but basically putting out a vague feeler.

If you don’t want to forge a relationship, you can start the distancing process by not replying to this email quickly. Wait a few days and then respond with a noncommittal, “I’m so happy spring has finally sprung! I hope you’re doing well and adjusting to life here.”

If they issue a specific invitation, you could respond by saying, “I’m sorry, but I don’t think that would work out. I wish you all the best, but we don’t seem to have much in common to build an active friendship upon.”

Dear Amy: I am an average attractive single woman who lives in a big city.

I am frequently approached by men of other races that flirt with me and try to get my phone number.

How do I tell them I am not interested without offending them?

No Thanks

Dear No Thanks: It is fairly easy to say, “No thank you.” But if you truly want to repel these interested men, you could tell them the truth: “No offense, but I’m a racist.”

They should leave you alone after that.