‘Full house’ isn’t cute sitcom for mom

Dear Amy: I’m a single woman with three children, ages 9, 16, and 24.

Recently my mother moved in with us. Soon after, a longtime friend of mine (and godmother to my eldest child) moved in with us, as well.

During the pandemic, my house has been very busy, as no one is working due to COVID-19.

I’ve noticed some things about my friend that I didn’t really notice before (or maybe chose to ignore). During everyday conversations she constantly interrupts everyone while they speak, and she doesn’t interrupt quietly, either.

Dominating a conversation is actually what she does and before anyone knows it the topic is turned on to herself. Wow! She is self-absorbed!

I’m not sure how to broach this subject, as I do not want to hurt her feelings.

Any ideas?

About to Explode!

Dear About To Explode!: Your friend is not a houseguest; for now, she is a member of the household, and should be treated like one.

You should consider the fact that your feelings, and the feelings of others in your household, are just as important as hers are. Each of us can usually tolerate a small dent to our feelings, as long as we feel respected.

You need to be brave enough to handle this deliberately, rather than waiting until you erupt and say something harsh in front of others.

You are providing housing to your friend — and your family members. You have the responsibility, and the right, to offer coursecorrectives in order for the household.

Talk to her privately. Tell her, quite plainly: “I’d like to offer you some feedback about a habit of yours that is bothering me. You tend to interrupt me and others when we’re trying to converse. It’s important to me that each of us has the opportunity to express ourselves. This includes you. But the kids — and my mom and I — all need the space to say what we need to say. Can you work on that?”

Your friend might interrupt you while you are trying to explain this. Wait patiently. She might react defensively or tell you that you’ve hurt her feelings. Wait patiently. The rest will be up to her.

In the future, when she interrupts, say, “Whoops. Wait a minute. I’d like to finish my thought.”