Efforts to connect met by silence

Dear Abby: I am engaged to an amazing guy. We have been together a little more than two years. During our first year, his family was great to me. They acted as if they liked me. However, things have changed. When my fiance and I are around them, they just wave and have little to say to me, if they say anything at all. They never call or text me; I’m always the one to do it first. Several times when I have texted, they haven’t replied.

My fiance is very supportive. He tells me things will get better and tries to make me feel better about it, but I’m starting to get the impression they don’t like me. Also, I don’t feel I have anything in common with his mother and sister, which makes me feel even more awkward. If you have any advice, please share.

Unliked In Kentucky

Dear Unliked: I’m sorry your relationship with his family hasn’t turned out to be what you envisioned it would be, but life can be like that. So take this step by step.

Nurture the relationships you have with friends, other couples and your own family. Relax, enjoy the life you are building with the man you love and take your cues for dealing with your future in-laws from your fiance. He knows them better than we do.

Dear Abby: My stepson, who had bipolar II, died by suicide a year and a half ago when we were away. We thought he was doing better, and his mom saw no reason to stay at our house while we were gone for a few days. This was my husband’s youngest, and he lived with us for 12 years.

I am still grieving, but my husband is grieving more. He had a heart attack five months to the day after his son’s suicide and then open-heart surgery. He doesn’t see the need for therapy, and he hates extra medication. What can I do? Concerned For Him In Texas

Dear Concerned: Tell your husband that his recent heart attack may have been connected to the tragic loss of his son.

If your husband is adamant about not getting grief counseling, tell him YOU are joining a grief support group, and you NEED him to accompany you because you don’t want to lose him, too.