Keep the friends, lose the boyfriend

Dear Amy: I am 58 years old, and my boyfriend of two years (who I once loved) thinks a great date is to take me to a pub (where most of my drinks are free) and then to his home to watch TV.

He is 68 and has claimed he is “poor” and on Social Security. Recently, he purchased over $10,000 in toys for himself: Guns, a safe, a laptop, a tablet, and a camera. We never go out.

I confronted him, and he said, “It’s my money.”

I understand that I need to leave the relationship, but I’ve made a lot of friends through him.

How do I keep the friends while losing the guy? — On the Way Out

Dear Way Out: This reminds me of the old joke where a guy walks into his psychiatrist’s office and says, “I need help. My brother is crazy. He thinks he’s a chicken.” The doctor says, “Why don’t you turn him in?” and the guy says, “I would, but I need the eggs.”

The fact is, your guy’s money is his own to spend. (You don’t mention any generosity that you might have extended in his direction, by the way.)

If guns and a laptop are what he really wants in life (hardly “toys,” I’d say), then he might not really miss you all that much. It might be possible for you to break off the romance with this man while still remaining friends with him. Stay cordial. Tell him you want to set him free to see other people.

Dear Amy: With all due respect, I think you missed a clue in the letter from “Wondering,” whose in-laws didn’t interact with the grandchildren, and the TV was always blaring.

I think it’s likely these older people suffer from hearing loss. Someone should look into it. — Reader from CA

Dear Reader: Yes, an always-blaring TV is definitely a sign of hearing loss. Thank you very much.