Grandmother shuns adopted child How are medical conditions named?

Dear Readers: I’ve stepped away from the Ask Amy column for two weeks to work on a new writing project. I hope you enjoy these edited “best of ” columns in my absence. All of these questions and answers were first published 10 years ago. Today’s topic is: Petty is as petty does.

Dear Amy: I had a child before I met my husband. When we got married, my husband adopted my daughter, who was a year old at the time. We then had three more children together. Now they’re all grown and have children of their own.

My mother-in-law wants to have a “generation picture” done. She plans to include only the children my husband and I have biologically together.

Is it rude of his mother to ask for pictures with our other children and to exclude her?

If my mother-in-law won’t include our daughter in the shot, I feel no pictures should be taken. — Confused and Hurt

Dear Confused: Your mother-in-law’s distinction between biological and adopted children is offensive. Adoptive parents are “real” parents in every way.

It is somewhat surprising that all of your children are now adults and yet your mother-in-law persists in differentiating among them.

You and your husband should have set her straight on this many years ago.

If you didn’t, or if she has forgotten what makes a family, now is the perfect time to educate her on the subject. I completely agree with your conditions regarding this family photo. (April, 2009)

Dear Readers: Are you curious about my background and life outside of the confines of this space? Read my two memoirs: “The Mighty Queens of Freeville” and “Strangers Tend to Tell Me Things,” available wherever books are sold or borrowed.

Dear Dr. Roach: How does a medical condition get named? Once named, can the name be changed? I have a condition called hemiplegic migraines. I am part of an online support group, and many people with the condition feel it should be renamed because the term “migraine” makes it seem less serious. Some were saying to call it TSS for “temporary stroke syndrome.” — E.D.V.

Hemiplegic migraine is a rare disorder that often runs in families. It is different from a regular migraine because it causes motor weakness during the aura phase. This can be terrifying for both the patient and the physician, as it can be indistinguishable from a stroke. The symptoms often start in the hand and then move up the arm and into the face. This usually lasts for hours. People also may experience a decreased ability to speak, dizziness, unsteadiness and even mental status changes ranging from confusion to coma during the event. I guarantee you that anyone, patient or physician, who knows this disease does not minimize its severity. However, I don’t expect the powers-thatbe who control nomenclature of diseases to be likely to change the name to TSS. Another condition, transient ischemic attack, is often called a temporary stroke because it has the same underlying cause as stroke (poor blood flow to an area of the brain). The term “hemiplegic” (meaning, “weakness on one side”) migraine is more accurately descriptive of your condition. An example of a renamed disease is Reiter’s syndrome (a type of arthritis sometimes associated with eye and urethra inflammation following an infection), named after Hans Reiter, who was a physician leader of the Nazi Party. The condition he named is now called reactive arthritis, both in condemnation of him as a war criminal, and because it is a more descriptive term.