Many-married man wonders how to date, explain history

Dear Amy: Iaminmy mid-50s and have been married four times.

I am a recovering alcoholic and drug addict.

I abused substances for 35 years.

I have been clean for three years now and my life today is beyond my wildest dreams.

I have repaired the relationships with family and have built solid friendships.

I attend church and am a completely new person.

My old life was dark and suicidal, but my new life is beautiful and positive.

I have done a lot of work on myself, with the help of therapy and AA.

I am concerned with people judging me by my past life.

How do I start dating and explain four divorces?

Do I bring this up on a first date? Do I wait to be asked? — Stormy Past

Dear Stormy: You’ve already persuaded four women to put their trust in you. Now you just have to do it sober.

The way to date is to start doing it! Tiptoe into the shallow end of the dating pool, with the support of your sponsor and sober community.

Coffee dates and/or lunch are the current standard for meeting new people.

If your date chooses to drink alcohol, you should tell her you don’t drink because you are an alcoholic in recovery.

Four divorces is not a firstdate topic. Your first should be devoted to covering more basics and listening.

You have every valid reason to take things very slowly.

If you are contemplating a relationship, you should tell her, “I have a very challenging history, and I think it’s right for me to tell you about it, so you can make your choice, with your eyes wide open.”