How I ended my part in a culture war

The inflection point may have been the 1996 Grammys. The Fugees won the Best Rap Album award for their album, “The Score,” and here comes Wyclef Jean wrapped in a Haitian flag expressing pride for the nation of his birth.

For many young people in the Haitian diaspora, that moment led to an awakening that it was acceptable to utter those three words, “I am Haitian.”

Throughout the mid-1990s, an implicit culture war between Haitians and Jamaicans permeated South Florida and manifested inside the buildings where we should be most protected — our schools.

In schools, these battles were primarily predicated on the struggles that Haitians had adjusting to life in the region. We were derisively called “boat people,” because of how many Haitians emigrated here, taking the often-fatal risk by boat to flee Haiti for a better life here in the States.

Instead of praising the admirable journey of survival, dedication and sacrifice, this provided non-Haitian students with a superiority complex that many demonstrated through mental, emotional and physical abuse of their Haitian peers.

Even though I was born in New York, my parents were both born in Haiti. In school, when I admitted my parents were from the island nation, my classmates often asked me if I came here by boat; these questions mostly came from my Jamaican classmates.

I bared the brunt of these misconceptions throughout middle and high school and built up resentment for Jamaican people as I faced intense bullying from my Jamaican classmates.

Resentment is a powerful feeling, and, on my journey, I have achieved healing through the same people I once felt a sense of resentment toward. I recently experienced a shift in how I’ve come to learn and appreciate Jamaica and its amazing people.

The impetus for writing this essay comes from this reality — lately, I’ve become better acquainted with people who happen to be from Jamaica or are of Jamaican descent.

• I met Andre, and while talking with him, he revealed that he left Jamaica in his teens. With his dad still in Jamaica and Andre moving to the United States to continue schooling, his father told him, “When you go to the States, learn their language [Haitian-Creole], and love the Haitian people.” He is now fluent in Haitian-Creole.

• In a short period of time, one of my Jamaican neighbors was able to greatly influence my personal and professional growth through humor, encouragement and friendship.

• Recently I stopped in Jamaica on a cruise. I was recounting my experience with a friend, and he emphatically stated, “Next time you go to Jamaica, just tell them you’re Haitian, and you can go anywhere. We love Haitians.”

• While attending a conference recently, I was lost looking for the presentation room. I became acquainted with another person; seemingly lost as I was. As she began to speak, I immediately detected an accent; she confirmed that she was Jamaican. Six months later, we closely collaborate on community service and mentorship opportunities through her nonprofit organization.

In summary, these recent experiences, and others I’ve had with Jamaicans, are reflective of a clear message — that what we have in common far outweighs our differences.

For some Haitians, maybe this all seems obvious. Maybe they have always had favorable experiences with their Jamaican neighbors and peers. Still, it is important to know that there was an existing rift between the diasporas of the nations that was prominent in the 1990s.

Rather than let resentment grow within me, I learned, explored, understood and ultimately healed through conversations and interactions I had with members of a people that I used to mistrust.

I could have never imagined writing about my recent shift in thinking and expressing my appreciation for Jamaica and all that its culture entails.

It used to bring up thoughts of pain and hurt, but now it brings up ideas of acceptance, appreciation and respect. We hear a lot about culture wars these days. I wonder if the people fighting them have ever sat down and talked with their perceived adversaries. Perhaps they would find they are not adversaries after all but allies.