Cultivating emotional and physical resilience

“How are you feeling?” When asked that question, most folks respond with a comment about the pain in their knee, a sore shoulder or belly bloating. It’s a lot tougher to discuss your emotional life and say aloud, “I’m pretty anxious” or “I’m feeling bummed out.” But it’s just as important to acknowledge your emotions as your physical distress.

Mental health isn’t divorced from physical wellbeing, and physical distress is not separate from emotional upset. Depression and anxiety are associated with chronic pain, gastrointestinal troubles and headache, as well as diabetes, obesity and physical selfharm. One recent study published in Stress & Health even found that the financial anxiety of the past months can lead to physical pain years down the road!

Conversely, chronic physical challenges, from heart attack to diabetes and arthritis, can fuel depression and anxiety. To thrive and arrive at older age with your good health and happiness, you have to attend to both physical and emotional problems. That’s been a heightened challenge during the pandemic.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found that during January of this year, more than 40% of adults ages 18 and older experienced depression or anxiety in the past week. Depression, which often comes along with anxiety, more than tripled during the COVID-19 pandemic, according to a study in JAMA Open Network.

Kids and young adults are taking a big hit: Nearly 10% of U.S. youth have severe major depression, up from 9.2% last year, and 40% to 50% of 18- to 44-year-olds living alone (a lot of folks do) report both anxiety and depression.

If you’re feeling “off” and would like to know if your emotions are a sign of mental distress, you can go to the online screening tool offered by Mental Health America at screening.mhanational.org. It will help you put a name to your emotions. The organization also offers do-it-yourself tools and resources to help you become healthier, emotionally and physically.

Let’s take a look at what else you can do to promote self-resilience and manage these often difficult emotions.

The name game: Identify your feelings; don’t squelch them. Resilience and psychological flexibility are needed to manage emotional distress and, say researchers in a study published in the Journal of Contextual Behavioral Science, they come from facing your negative emotions and then expressing yourself to family, friends and health care professionals.

Less social media, more socializing: If you’re a social media maven, it turns out that online exchanges about how you’re feeling and dealing with life’s challenges don’t do you harm, but they don’t help either, according to a study in Addictive Behaviors. The researchers say that only real-life social support is linked to better overall mental health. They theorize that “social media interactions don’t allow for more substantial connection, which may be needed to provide the type of support that protects against negative mental health.” So as the world opens up, you should too — to friends and family face to face (masked when needed).

Don’t let anger fester: A study in the Journal of Gerontology found that carrying your anger to bed keeps happiness-eroding emotions such as anger, fear and distress alive and kicking. For help in resolving conflicts, check out “The Anger Detox Plan” at DoctorOz.com.

Help your kids cope, too: On Our Sleeves is a remarkable resource for parents on how to start conversations with kids about feelings and to foster healthy emotional development. Check it out at onoursleeves.org.

Get professional help: Depression and anxiety are treatable. If you feel that you need help, ask your doctor for a referral to a therapist or group/program that will help you take charge of your mental and physical wellbeing.

And have a cup o’ cocoa! Increased consumption of flavanols found in chocolate (also fruit and vegetables) improves blood flow when you’re stressed and helps protect you from mental stress-induced cardiovascular woes such as stroke and heart disease.

Mehmet Oz, M.D. is host of “The Dr. Oz Show,” and Mike Roizen, M.D. is Chief Wellness Officer and Chair of Wellness Institute at Cleveland Clinic. To live your healthiest, tune into “The Dr. Oz Show” or visit sharecare.com.