Wife suspects she’s found hubby’s child

Dear Abby: While searching for two of my husband’s childhood friends, with his knowledge, I believe I may have found a child he doesn’t know is his. I’m not positive that the child is his, but the time frame and location indicate that he could be, and there’s a strong resemblance to my husband’s brother.

I am curious whether my hunch is correct, but I’m afraid of asking the questions, not knowing how they would be received. The child could have been conceived during a casual, onenight stand before we started dating.

I now wish I had never found this information. If the child is his, the mother has kept this from him for more than 10 years.

What’s the right thing to do?

Dear Wondering: I see nothing to be gained by withholding this from your spouse. Tell your husband about your research, and what you think you may have turned up. Then ask if he is acquainted with the child’s mother.

Dear Abby: One of my fond memories of my father when I was grow- ing up was that he would always order my mom’s meal when we were out for dinner. My husband does the same for me.

One couple we dine out with regularly gives me a difficult time about this “tradition.” They make comments like, “Oh, Susan’s not allowed to speak in a restaurant.” I have explained that it was a cherished memory of mine and not something forced on me.

I try to respect opinions that differ from my own. Do you think I’m living in the Stone Age?

Dear Susan: No, I do not; you appear to be living quite happily in the present. While the tradition you and your husband are observing is “antiquated,” you are hurting no one.

From my perspective, you might enjoy your evenings out more if you shared them with this couple less often.