Wife’s job worries her husband
We have been married for almost 11 years and have three children. About four years ago my wife cheated on me and left. After a six-week split, we decided we wanted to work things out. Everything was great — until recently, when she got a job working at a busy gym.
Several of the guys from the gym have added her on Facebook and send her messages. They like all her posts and pictures. I work out there and when I go in, I see her laughing and joking with them. This has all started to bring me flashbacks to when she cheated.
I tried talking to her about how I feel, but she just says they are my insecurity issues and I need to deal with them. At this point, I’m contemplating divorce so I won’t go through the same pain I went through last time.
My wife has no interest in marriage counseling, but tells me I should seek professional help for my issues. Is there HOROSCOPE
(March 21-April 19). There’s a reprieve in whatever relationship strife you’ve been experiencing. Rest confident that the one you love loves you.
(April 20-May 20). When you show up with an open heart, your very presence is a comfort to those who need it.
(May 21-June 21). You have a family you were born to and a family you define. There’s an occasion coming up where the two might intersect, and this will turn out just fine. Relax. There’s nothing to worry about.
(June 22-July 22). You may not be a schoolchild, but you’re not too old to show your work to someone whose opinion matters to you or to hang it up in an important place.
(July 23-Aug. 22). Small talk won’t naturally gravitate to the things you care about unless you steer it in that direction. Do so today, because you’ll get more enjoyment from connecting with people on what truly interests you.
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You can and should automate and improve the process of day-to-day business. You’ll never know what your time could be better spent doing until you open some of it up to the possibilities.
(Sept. 23-Oct. 23). When you make efforts to see the bigger picture, you’ll notice, with mixed feelings, that many people around you face dramatic challenges that make your own grievances seem trivial.
(Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Being a fan of great any saving this marriage, or is it time to move on? — Threatened In Texas
Part of your wife’s job is to be friendly to the members of that gym. It doesn’t mean that she’s involved with any of them outside of work. The problem with jealousy and insecurity is that unless they are managed, they tend to feed on each other and grow. While I can’t banish the suspicions from your mind, some sessions with a licensed mental health professional might help you to put them into perspective. It may save your marriage. However, if it doesn’t ease your mind, you can always talk to a lawyer.
Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAb by.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069. Can't get enough advice? Find more columns from Carolyn Hax and other columnists on advice.azcentral.com. work perks your awareness and raises your bar, making you a candidate for eventual great work yourself. No pressure, though: For now, enjoy your fandom status.
(Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Everyone needs support and compassion, and yet there are not as may givers of these things as there could be. If you feel like you’re making up for the thoughtlessness and ignorance of others, you are.
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Get rid of the things that make you unhappy, and see if that doesn’t clear your windshield somewhat.
(Jan. 20-Feb. 18). An unexpected wrinkle arises. This prompts you to seek expert help. There’s much available you won’t have to pay for. Follow the prescription to a T and you’ll be home free.
(Feb. 19-March 20). The best position is the one with the least to lose. Paradoxically, to get there, you have to agree to lose things. You’ll loosen your grip on something you thought you needed. Turns out, you don’t.
(Dec. 1). There’s a romantic confession and an exciting proposition right at the top of this solar return. In April you’ll become one with your equipment and conquer work that used to take you 10 times as long. You’ll then have the time for a moneymaking venture and sock it away through spring. Taurus and Aries adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 32, 30, 2, 40 and 16. 10 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 23 24 26 27 29 31 32 33 36 40 41 42 43 44 46 48 Just for guys Mr. Goldfinger Paul Drake’s creator Downs of “20/20” Groovy Anchor terminus What never to tell (2 wds.) Mi. above sea level Coat for a house Act glad Buy a round Two-door car Hot-dog topper Gentleman callers Some poems King and queen Get a loan Stay friends (3 wds.) — Moines Brink Blissful spot Metaphysical poet Dilapidated “X — the spot” Virtual 55 56 57 59 60 61 62 63 64 He gave us a lift Sanskrit dialect Novelist — Zola Hoedown honeys Horse-trade Polishes planks Dispatch a dragon Motor lodges Frat-party wear DOWN 1 Pre-Tina Turner 2 Novelist Jean — 3 Chatterboxes 4 Cherry seed 5 — out (checks) 6 Red-ink entry 7 — Man Triathlon 8 — du jour 9 Firm up 10 Gumshoe 11 Spring bloomer 12 Like an acrobat 13 Clarified butter 22 Long sigh 23 Marching band composer Gentle slope Ungentlemanly ones 25 26 12-01-16 27 Kind of rage 28 Competitive advantage Deputy’s need Buffalo’s lake Roasting ear Predetermining Half a fortnight Counting-rhyme start Draw forth Decades Turns right Not casual Prompt 29 30 32 33 34 35 37 38 39 43 44 46 47 48 49 50 51 53 54 56 58 Copper or zinc St. Teresa’s town Handy swabs (hyph.) Records, as mileage Break of day Joie de vivre Tynan portrayer She preceded Mamie Air-pump meas. Kind of jacket