There is no upside to cliched ‘The Upside’
What’s the bright side to “The Upside?” You’ll likely be watching this for free on TBS within 6 months as cannon fodder for a lineup of other oft-forgettable, saccharine affairs.
A remake of the French buddy comedy “The Intouchables” and based on a true story to boot, this American take boasts little originality with cliched dialogue and a mess of subplots that makes viewers feel every second of its 126 minutes. Though the original made a splash eight years ago, “Upside” feels tired and weighed down by its own earnestness as a paroled ne’er-do-well (Kevin Hart) finds responsibility and compassion as caregiver for a sullen and paralyzed billionaire (Bryan Cranston).
Hart indulges in sitcom-level hijinks as Dell, a deadbeat dad recently paroled from prison just looking to get his parole officer off his back, when he misguidedly saunters into uber-rich Phillip’s penthouse for what he thinks is a janitorial job interview. It’s actually to serve as a “life auxiliary” for Phillip, who as a paraplegic, cannot move his arms or legs. Philip’s assistant Yvonne (Nicole Kidman) is initially unimpressed by Dell’s gruff manner but acquiesces when her boss hires him as his live-in assistant.
It’s clear that Philip’s motivation in employing the unqualified Dell is to make sure the new hire doesn’t extend any life-saving measures. Despite being richer than Jay-Z, he feels empty following the death of his wife and is traumatized by the life-changing paragliding accident that claimed his mobility.
This latest film from Neil Burger (of “The Illusionist” and “Divergent” fame) crash lands into a relentless slog that shrugs off any real conflict. When Dell steals Philip’s prized copy of “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn” to give to his estranged son early in the movie it’s expected that the dramatic climax would be centered around this deceit. But it amounts to nothing more than a deep sigh.
Despite their palpable comedic chops, Hart and Cranston are unable to make this unlikely and stereotypical pair likable even when they order 15 hot dogs in a munchies-induced feast, tear through packed streets in a police chase and smash expensive bottles of wine.
There are would-be gags that fall completely flat. Hart, who recently was steeped in controversy for previous homophobic jokes and tweets, acts disgusted at the prospect of changing his employer’s catheter in a too-long sequence in which the comedian can’t even utter the word “penis” without dry heaving.
Phillip, who only can move his neck (and his smart mouth for a “that’s what she said” joke), has a sly glint in his eye when he’s bamboozling uppity neighbors and faking a seizure. Cranston’s dramatic moments include a soured epistolary relationship with a librarian (Juliana Margulies) and a Howard Hughes-esque exile are well-acted but hardly enough to keep momentum in a movie bogged down by the push-pull of cartoonish one-liners and emotional set pieces.
The underused Kidman is reduced to an buttoned-up square whose cold exterior eventually is thawed by Hart’s shenanigans. She’s clearly collecting a check as this mousy maven who is shoehorned in as a potential love interest for Cranston in the final act. The other prominent female character, Latrice, Dell’s beleaguered ex (Aja Naomi King) is given little more than eye-rolls to punctuate her disdain for Hart’s character. “The Upside” feels extremely dated for a movie originally scheduled for release in 2017. It’s something that would have been an awards ploy around the time of “Two Weeks Notice” and “The Pursuit of Happyness” but, much like Hart’s chances of hosting this year’s Oscars, will see little gold.