Man has dating bone to pick

Dear Abby: I have something to say about “Still Fun in the South” (Jan. 4) and her complaint that single middleaged men only look for younger women, instead of women their age. I am a 53year-old widower. I have a six-figure income. I’m smart, healthy, easygoing and have a good life with many hobbies and interests.

On multiple dating apps, I have swiped right on dozens of women my age. My main criteria were that they weren’t fanatically religious or rabidly political. Would you like to know how many swipe rights I received in return? Not one! I feel middle-aged women are far more picky than their younger counterparts, which is why I’m currently in a relationship with a woman in her mid-30s. I don’t pursue younger women – they pursue me while the women around my age couldn’t be bothered.

I realize my dating experience is anecdotal, and there are extenuating circumstances (COVID), but I don’t like being lumped into a category and complained about as if middle-aged women share none of the responsibility.

I want to tell “Still Fun” that if she wants a relationship with someone her age, she needs to be a little less judgmental and picky and give those middle-aged men who actually show an interest a chance. She might find there’s more to them than appears in a dating profile.

– Seasoned in Salt Lake City

Dear Seasoned: The responders to “Still Fun’s” letter pointed out the advantages AND disadvantages of dating people younger, older and the same age. But the common denominator for successful dating, according to those readers, is to emphasize what you are happy about in your life and describe your passions and interests. Someone who exudes confidence, a love of life and who doesn’t come across as desperate for a permanent move-in partner can do very well.