How not to get ‘catfished’ online

Five tips to protect your heart from online scammers.

Men and women older than 50 can feel quite vulnerable when it comes to dating online. Now since the story of Manti Te’o’s imaginary romance appeared all over the news, both have become worried about getting “catfished.”

This happens when a man or woman uses a false identity to create a relationship that deceives the romantic heart and possibly the pocketbook of a virtual suitor.

So, if it could happen to this Notre Dame football star, what’s keeping it from happening to you?

Here are five tips for identifying “catfishers” and how to protect your heart from these online scammers:

Date closer to home: Limit the men or women you want to meet to those who live within a two-hour drive of your home. This is a manageable amount of driving time and leaves no excuses for not being able to meet right away.

Limit the number of emails and phone calls: It’s very easy to get pulled into an email and phone relationship. Technology creates a false sense of intimacy and many men and women reveal far too much information about themselves at this stage.

You start falling in love with an inaccurate picture you’ve painted in your mind of who they are.

This is not who the real person is.

Meet your potential love sooner rather than later: You’ll want to meet a new match as soon as you can to see if those pictures you’ve created in your mind actually match the real person.

Excuses not to meet are a huge red flag: If someone’s really interested in you, they’re going to want to meet quickly to see if there’s a spark between the two of you.

One excuse, whether it’s, “I’m sick,” or “I have a huge project due soon,” is fine. Beyond one excuse for not meeting, you are dealing with someone who may not be the person they say they are.

If they ask you for money, run!: People, who want to scam you, usually play with your heart. They figure out what makes it sing and use this information to create a false relationship with you.

They’ll tell you their child is sick, they have no access to their money and they really need your help. Women especially are touched by this and have a hard time saying no. It’s only a matter of time before they ask you to wire money and sadly, many do.