Victim of a nasty comment? Take time to think before acting

Have you ever been blindsided by a comment or behavior? Perhaps the person was the last one you would have thought could make such a digging comment or act in a rude way. Initially you may feel shocked and even hurt by their actions. It takes a while to thoroughly digest what happened. While it may be necessary to respond in a timely fashion, you also want to be sure to lean back and take a broad perspective before acting. This allows for clarity and surefootedness in the next steps.

We recently witnessed this dynamic in a fitness class. The leader of the class was also the gym owner. She had spent decades of her life growing her business. She helped thousands of people over the years reach their wellness goals. This was her life’s work, and she had invested her heart, money and expertise in fulfilling her destiny.

You can imagine her surprise when she learned that a student she had helped for several years was speaking badly about her. When she first learned of this, she dismissed it thinking there was a misunderstanding. After multiple reports, though, she had to face the truth. This person was intentionally trying to harm her personally as well as her business and reputation. Much to her dismay, it became clear to the gym owner that something a bit more sinister was taking place.

Has a betrayal like this ever happened to you or someone you care about? It can feel a bit like being torpedoed, can’t it? It’s difficult to understand why someone would proceed in such an aversive manner. There are many possible reasons, but you may never fully understand. Some people are simply unhappy, so they project that onto you. Some are desperate for control and relevance. Whatever the reason, seek care and wisdom from people you know for sure are trustworthy and appreciate who you are.