Focusing on others’ conflict can disrupt your own peace

Do you find yourself titillated by someone else’s drama? Do you find it comforting to indulge in media that focuses on conflict and potential disruption to people’s peace? If so, this may be an indication that you’re not feeling fulfilled in your own life.

You may be seeking excitement and stimulation by watching others’ lives play out, even to their detriment.

What happens when you engage in this type of material often? You have mirror neurons in your brain and body that make the drama feel like it is happening to you. This creates stress, tension and anxiety in the mind and body.

You shift from becoming a spectator to a participant in the dynamics before you.

You may not be ready to give this indulgence up just yet because you get some satisfaction from it. That’s understandable. Ask yourself if it’s serving your best interest. If you’re already vulnerable in your own struggles, this type of content can really sink you.

This may also be true when family and friends try to draw you into their conflicts.

There are some personalities that get a charge from explosive emotions and theatrical relationship dynamics. Notice how you might get pulled into these situations even if they don’t have anything to do with you.

You may feel called to join them in this way out of obligation to show that you’re an ally. This is a form of people-pleasing that can sabotage your own inner peace and well-being.

If you find that you tend to be expected to join in on conflicts that others are engaging, have a meaningful conversation with your loved ones and let them know how it’s affecting you. It’s healthy to set boundaries. Non-engagement is one option.

Care is a two-way street, so give them the opportunity to refrain from this behavior as a way to show love to you.

You may choose to offer other ways that you’d like to engage and show up for them.