For Muslims who can’t fast for health reasons, Ramadan looks different
Some with exemptions such as pregnancy struggle to feel connected
For the last few weeks, millions of Muslims worldwide have observed the Islamic holy month of Ramadan. It’s a season of community, charity, and spiritual discipline generally marked by daily fasts, communal prayer, and charity.
But many who can’t fast due to health reasons, such as pregnancy or diabetes, experience the month differently.
Fasting during Ramadan, which ends Friday or Saturday, means abstaining from eating and drinking from dawn to sunset. Exemptions include those who are traveling, sick, elderly, pregnant, or menstruating, according to Mohammad Hassan Khalil, a professor of religious studies and director of the Muslim Studies program at Michigan State University.
However, there are differences of interpretations on who exactly should be exempt according to religious text. “For example, there are a wide range of opinions of who is considered sick or traveling,” Khalil said.
This can make it harder for people who don’t fast due to illness, especially those struggling with mental health problems and other stigmatized conditions, to feel understood and supported in their decision not to fast, even when that decision is supported by their doctors.
Sara, of Somerville, who asked that her real name be withheld, does not fast because she struggles with anorexia. She said it’s harder for her to feel connected to other Muslims during the month.
“It doesn’t even feel like Ramadan right now,” the 23-year-old said, because she has not sought out Muslim spaces since moving to the area last year, something she likely would have done this month if she was fasting. Her hesitation stems not just from worries about uncomfortable conversations or judgment, but
also because it can be hard for her to watch others fast when she can’t.
“There’s still a lot of internal shame people can have over things that are completely out of their control,” Sara said.
For some, spending Ramadan alone while not fasting can take a toll on their faith. In 2015, Asiya Paul was diagnosed with breast cancer and did not fast that Ramadan while undergoing treatment following the advice of her doctor.
It was a difficult time for the 56-year-old Roxbury native, who was going through a divorce and housing insecurity. So, Paul stayed with non-Muslim relatives 45 minutes outside of the city and, during Ramadan, found herself withdrawing more from others.
“I never felt that if I wasn’t fasting I didn’t deserve to be at the mosque,” she said. “It was depression talking.”
That period, she said, also coincided with diminished faith that she connects to trying to worship on her own, on top of dealing with serious health concerns. Now recovered, Paul is back to fasting and drawn closer to her mosque community.
Her sister-in-law Dananai Morgan had a baby two months ago and, like many Muslim women, is not fasting while she recovers and breastfeeds.
This is the third time she has been nursing and not fasting during Ramadan but it’s the first one in which she is actively pushing herself to be present in the community.
“It does feel at first a little bit like you’re not really participating in the season” and can be easy to convince yourself to stay home, said Morgan, a fund-raiser at the Museum of Science in Boston and a board member of the Neighborhood Birth Center.
Feeling comfortable going to the mosque can also be complicated for mothers of young children, said the now-mother of three, because you’re worried about your children being disruptive to others in the mosque. But, she said, that doesn’t have to be the case and she is already seeing younger women make more space for themselves at the mosque, showing up even when they’re not fasting or praying for different reasons.
“I felt very insecure when my kids were younger, but I think we have to work on liberating ourselves from that negative self-talk … and create more opportunities for connection for new mothers,” Morgan said.
Fasting is just one part of Ramadan, Morgan said, and it’s important for people to focus on the other ways they can strengthen their faith and connect with their communities, not just religious ones. In addition to resting and connecting with her newborn, she is also learning Arabic on the Duolingo app, reading more scripture, and teaching her other two sons the importance of kindness and charity.
“The other day, one of my sons got in the car and said, ‘I did a good deed. My coach was picking up cones on the field and I helped him,’” she said with a laugh.
This Ramadan, Sara has focused on establishing healthy habits like making her daily prayers and practicing more kindness and empathy.
“It’s a time, not just for fasting, but also a time of spiritual devotion and putting more emphasis on that makes it easier to participate,” she said.
‘It does feel at first a little bit like you’re not really participating in the season.’ DANANAI MORGAN, who is not fasting while she breastfeeds her newborn