Fielding life’s curve balls
Though admittedly I have led a somewhat blessed life and have so much to be grateful for each day, I was not unhappy to say goodbye to 2022. We lost our mother and grandmother/great-grandmother, Lynn Crane, as well as witnessed other close friends and family suffer similar losses, due to age and mortality, long COVID or other ailments. The business had an incredible year, and I got to suffer through an interesting 15 minutes of fame departing from a part-time gig that I really enjoyed. Health challenges came to many in my immediate circle, including my first-born daughter, Barclay Carson, as well as her twin Mighty Mites, and their household, which seemingly faced down nearly every viral infection that vaccinated toddlers might expect.
And yet, through almost all of that, with only the occasional sighs of fatigue, Barclay soldiered on through it all with a smile and warm heart. She reminded me again the great importance of attitude, as well as gratitude, in surmounting life’s numerous challenges.
We all have acquaintances, friends and family who have real trouble fielding life’s curve balls. Some sink into despair, depression, addiction and worse. It is also incumbent upon each of us to be there for them. Though some of the stigma is finally fading around issues of mental health, and there is actually a new 24-hour mental crisis prevention hotline, 9-8-8, many may still be overwhelmed by a sudden hostile turn of events.
I am speaking of the damage that can be wrought by an unexpected divorce, loss of a job, or sudden death of a partner or family member. Having attempted to be there for friends and family experiencing each of these circumstances during 2022, I can also attest that at times the offer of assistance/ support is not readily accepted, but I can assure you that the offer of a helping hand is noted, and at least inside their heart and mind, it is appreciated.
We don’t get to choose the cards we get dealt, only how we react and play that hand. Many view adversity and conflict as insurmountable obstacles. They are not. In my mid-40s, after a productive decade with a global public relations firm, a personality conflict with my supervisor could no longer be avoided. I took a leap of faith and left the enterprise. There were some really challenging early years building out our small firm, but I have never looked back. And the successes since, economically and otherwise, would never have arrived in that other structure and environment.
Our youngest child was not planned, but once expected, we prepared, as we understood hers might be a life with some cognitive and other health challenges. Our Olivia also turned out to be both the glue and the sunlight in our small family, particularly in those early years. My lucky number, 13, is considered bad luck and even a bad omen by many, yet time and again, in Las Vegas and elsewhere, it has delivered for me... again, those choices of how you play the hand.
Entering this year, with some familial rebounds underway, I can’t help but feel and believe that 2023 will bring us some wonderful surprises. Those, too, require an appropriate attitude, gratitude and response. I have again witnessed quite a few others blow some wonderful opportunities, largely due to the sudden nature of the offered change of life and pace.
Don’t be afraid as you see those curve balls coming across the plate to seek advice and counsel from those whose opinions and thinking you admire most. Friends and family sincerely want to help you. The best of those have also learned the lesson of withholding their advice until it is sought, versus always having ‘the best ideas’ to offer and suggest, unasked.
Enough parables for this column and day, but seriously as you go through 2023... remember how much easier it is to smile versus frown, two muscles, versus a few dozen, to offer a handshake versus a stiff arm and raised palm. Again, it’s all about those choices. Take care out there.