Counseling, not retirement, might ease work frustration

I am almost 62 and struggling to get through the day at work. It’s not because of the work itself, but I am extremely unhappy in the work environment.

I have been here more than 20 years, and I have a real problem with the work ethic of the younger employees. They come in to work anywhere from a half-hour to two hours late. One of them takes hourlong breaks, twohour lunches and then leaves early. Another comes to work and complains about her drive, her ex and all her aches and pains. (She just turned 40.) I go home every night frustrated and stressed.

I really want to retire. It wouldn’t be a financial burden, although we would have to cut back on a little spending. My husband won’t offer an opinion, but I know I’d be much happier. Any advice?

You might be happier and healthier if, rather than retire early, you talked to a licensed mental health professional about how to manage your stress. You can’t control the behavior (or misbehavior) of your younger co-workers. That’s your boss’s responsibility.

And as to the woman who complains about her aches, her pains and her ex — why are you listening to that garbage? You have only a few more years until you reach an age at which you can retire with all the benefits you have earned — and without having to cut back.

I recently had a phone conversation with a cousin who lives on the other side of the country. We talk once a month. She has always been judgmental and negative about our cousins, aunts, uncles, etc., who — for the most part — she rarely communicates with. In the past, when she would put them down, I’d cut the conversation short because I didn’t want to listen.

During our last chat, she started in on my brother. That’s when I lost it. I gave her a piece of my mind and hung up. She has texted and called a few times, but I haven’t responded.

I feel bad, but I refuse to listen to her talk about and judge other family members. She said in one text that she “didn’t mean to upset me,” That’s no apology.

You should respond to your cousin. She needs to understand that you are changing the rules regarding further conversations. Explain that it has always made you uncomfortable when she said unkind, judgmental things about family members, and that when she started in on your brother, you finally reached your limit. The ball will be in her court. See whether she follows through.

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