BIRDIE FEVER
Pub Thirteen at Nationwide golf tournament has spectators thirsting for good putts
Finally found out what it takes for Buckeye Nation to bombard one of its own with cheap boos. Cheap booze. Rather, the lack thereof.
When former Ohio State golfer Ryan Armour missed his 12foot birdie putt at the 13th hole on the Scarlet Course on Friday, some fans in the nearby beer tent bellowed their mostly tongue-in-cheek disappointment.
They still love their Buckeyes, but might love their $1 beer even more. And Armour’s miss cost them a chance to throw back 16 ounces of Miller Lite for buck or a shot of Watershed bourbon for $3.
If Armour had birdied, he would have been the most popular player on the Korn Ferry Tour. At least until the next guy birdied.
That’s how it works at Pub Thirteen, the beer/booze tent adjacent to the 13th hole that gets constructed every year during the Nationwide Children’s Hospital Championship. Known
by one longtime imbiber as “The Greatest Atmosphere in Sports,” the pub does not discriminate. When a birdie putt drops, beer and booze prices drop with it. A clock counts down from 13:00 to 0:00 after each birdie, giving thirsty spectators 13 minutes to get in on the deals. (Beers cost $4 to $6 and the harder stuff $7 outside of the birdie window).
Sometimes the clock barely begins ticking before starting anew as another birdie occurs. Thursday’s first round saw 30 birdies, each one receiving a “bravo” from the crowd.
But Pub Thirteen denizens do not discriminate. When a birdie opportunity turns into par or worse? Razz City.
“You can’t boo an Ohio State guy,” Armour said, looking stunned but then managing a slight smile. “They think the hole should be the size of a basketball hoop.”
When fans aren’t cheering and booing, they’re kibitzing. The cheap beer buys most of the attention, but it’s the friendships — some old, some new — that make the experience worth returning to year after year.
In that way, golf really is just a backdrop to hilarious conversation, high school reminiscing and recalling college days gone by. As long as the beer is cold and the whiskey wet, men and women find commonalities in catching up on family, work and the wonders of the world.
“I’d pay whatever it is; that’s not the important part of this,” said Ernie Tuller, a 76-year-old retiree from Dublin who for the past six years has made his way to Pub Thirteen with his 80-yearold neighbor, Ed Tumulty.
“It’s a fellowship thing,” Tuller continued. “We’re neighbors and we don’t ask a lot of other people here. I call (Tumulty) and tell him, ‘Put it on your calendar.’ This is a great summer deal. You can’t do this at Muirfield. Can’t do it at the Bogey Inn, where it’s $25 for a beer.”
It can get loud. A veteran of the temporary watering hole told me that about 100 fans inside the Tv-infused tent had to be hushed for being too noisy while watching Akron nearly upset Michigan in football in 2013.
Tumulty and Tuller wish there was less noise — not at the tent but about the tent.
“We want to keep it quiet,” Tumulty said. “We don’t want people to know where this venue is.”
Too late.
I get why the two neighbors want Pub Thirteen mostly to themselves and a few dozen others, but if that were the case then fewer people would get to enjoy their joie de vivre and the way they needle each other — and me — like only longtime friends can do when beer and golf mix.
I asked Tuller, an occasional golfer, what his handicap is.
“It’s standing under this tree talking to you,” he said without missing a beat.
Tumulty, who grew up in Springfield, Illinois, took me aside at one point and told of how he and his sister used to play on the back porch of Abraham Lincoln’s home.
Tuller let me know that his ancestors were partly responsible for settling Dublin. He also boasted he has been married to Cheryl for 57 years. When Tumulty interrupted that he has been married to Carol for 58, Tuller quipped, “But ask her and she says it feels like 90.” Ba-dum-bum.
Was it the beer talking? Maybe. But I like to think those few extra sips were simply loosening lips that have much wisdom and wit to share. In the end, that is the real power of Pub Thirteen. roller@dispatch.com @rollercd