Families of overdose victims mourn their loved ones in unison
Grieving families living with the loss of loved ones to overdoses mourned in unison on Overdose Awareness Day at Cairn Recovery Resources.
“We know that there’s a large stigma around substance abuse, so this is a time when we can all come together and support those, the families, that have lost people to show them that their loved one was not their disease,” organizer Monica Batteiger said.
Families and friends could engrave a lock to place on a fence dedicated to overdose victims and release a balloon in their honor.
The program, sponsored by Drug Free Muskingum, opened the stage to family members to share their experiences with addiction.
Kelly Kocher lost her son, Joel Liston, in 2018.
He was one of 42 people to die of an overdose in Muskingum County that year.
Liston had overdosed three times that week before his body couldn’t take the abuse any longer.
Even though Kocher has a strict no drugs in the house policy, she still stood by her son as he overdosed in her bathroom and convulsed in the courtyard of her condo.
Neighbors gathered outside, asking what was going on. She responded by telling them he was high.
“It’s embarrassing,” she said. Exercising some tough love, Kocher took photos and videos of her son with plans to show him what his addiction looks like.
But as his lips turned blue, she realized he was overdosing and called for help.
He was given two doses of Narcan to keep him alive.
After being released, he chose to celebrate his 33rd birthday with just his mom that year.
They had pizza together and took selfies.
“Thank God I did, because that was the last I got of him,” Kocher said. “He went for the weekend with his friends, and it wasn’t good.”
She got a call from one of his friends telling her to come pick him up from the gas station.
That night, Liston manually opened the garage door to sneak out of the house.
Kocher just wanted him home, so she sent him a message on Facebook, apologizing for yelling at him that day and letting him know she loves him. He would never read that message. The following morning, Kocher got a call from the hospital telling her Liston had overdosed and was on life support.
He had no brain activity because he went 20 minutes without oxygen.
Kocher explained that the people he was with were too busy hiding things and stealing the shoes off his feet before calling 911.
It’s something that happens far to often, Zanesville Fire Chief Jeff Bell said.
“It is a terrible feeling when you have a friend (or) family member that is afraid to call for help or delays the call for help because they’re afraid of getting in trouble with law enforcement,” he said.
Bell said it’s not unusual to get calls to hotel rooms where the door is locked and the overdose victim is alone and unconscious in the bathtub.
“There’s somebody that made that call, left them in that situation because they’re afraid of getting in trouble,” he said.
Kocher said she tried letting her son know that the people who used with him were not his friends.
They didn’t get him help right away, and they weren’t by his side as his family made the difficult decision to take Liston off of life support.
Kocher put on fresh lipstick and gave her son his last kiss, just as she gave him his first.
“That about killed me,” she said. They donated his organs hoping to make something good come from a bad situation.
Her daughter is also an addict who is currently in detox.
“And I think, I can’t do this twice,” Kocher said.
She pleaded with any addicts in attendance to do whatever they can to get clean.
“Don’t put your families through this,” she said. “You don’t know you’re dead. You’re done. But you’re family, they’re going to grieve the rest of their lives for you.”
Emily Tarbert, Zanesville’s assistant law director, shared a similar message with the crowd.
“For anyone out there struggling right now, please choose us. Choose to be here with us. Choose to be with us every damn day until it gets easier, and never ever give up,” she said.
Tarbert lost her little brother, Taylor Strang, three years ago to the day of her speech.
His overdose has left her family questioning their actions and filled with sorrow.
“It’s the grief that saddens us, but it’s these what-ifs or should I have that can destroy us,” she said. “And really, the truth is, that everyone standing in this parking lot today who has lost someone from an overdose did the very best they could at that time.”
For Jodi Niceswanger, the death of her daughter, 27-year-old Laikyn Wisecarver, came as a shock.
Wisecarver had been a year sober and was working in recovery when she relapsed and died.
But her family and friends aren’t letting Wisecarver’s life go forgotten.
They’ve created Laikyn’s Legacy of Hope, in honor of the young woman who had a giving heart.
The group meets Sunday evenings from 6 to 7:30 at Bethel Community Center in Zanesville.
Support is offered to anyone with any kind of struggle, in addition to addiction.
Since 2018, 140 people in Muskingum County have died from overdoses.
In Zanesville alone, the fire department has responded to 838 calls for potential overdoses since 2018.
The numbers have been declining slightly each year.
So far in 2021, there have been 20 fatal overdoses recoded by the health department. Last year, there were 39 in total.
As a way of helping the friends and family of addicts in case of an overdose, the health department provided free naloxone training and doses to those who chose to participate during Tuesday’s event. cmholmes@gannett.com 740-450-6758
Twitter: @cmholmesgannett