New couple arising from pair of divorces shocks reader

Dear Abby: My wife and I hope you can answer a question for us. Two couples we were extremely close with for more than 10 years were divorced two and three years ago. We have just been told that Husband A has been secretly dating Wife B for six months. Wife A and Wife B were “besties.” The men were good friends, but not best friends like the women. Both couples were married for more than 25 years. They are all in their mid- to late 50s.

My question is, is there a code where you don’t date one of your friend’s exes?

— Taken Aback In California

Dear Taken Aback: While divorce among long-married older adults (“gray divorces”) may seem shocking to you, it has become more common. Many women are more economically independent than they were in decades past. The situation you have described is regrettable, but it is no longer shocking. Be smart. Remain on the sidelines and don’t judge.

Dear Abby: I want to go back to school and get recertification as an

EMT. My goal is to reach paramedic level. I’ll be 62 on my next birthday and have a few health problems. Is my goal realistic? I plan to use these skills by volunteering in my community. I was a nationally certified EMT and hospital corpsman in my younger days.

— Next Phase In North Carolina

Dear Next Phase: If you can meet the physical qualifications, and since you already have the training, go for it! I wish you the best of luck.

Dear Abby: Why do former classmates still send Facebook friend requests 16 years after we have graduated? These are people I barely had contact with or none at all while we were in school. I knew of them because of the yearbook, but other than that — nothing. Is this common? Was it because they came across the “people you may know” feature and saw what I look like today and think I’m cute and what they missed out on?

— Mystified In Washington

Dear Mystified: It’s possible because of the miracle of the internet. However, not everyone falls into that category. If you don’t wish to be contacted, you are free to delete the messages.