Domestic violence hits home
John Calipari wanted to answer questions about Travis Diener.
This was after Jeremy Hunt had been arrested for allegedly hitting his girlfriend.
I say allegedly, but her face said otherwise.
Her left eye was black and blue, her right eye was visibly swollen, and there was a cut on her nose and another cut near her left eye.
Calipari met with reporters before a home game against Marquette. This is how the discussion went:
Q: “What will Jeremy Hunt’s status be for tonight?”
A: “I don’t know if there will be any change in status.”
Q: “So he could dress and play?” A: “Sure.” At that point, Calipari made it clear what he thought about the entire line of questioning. “I want to talk about Marquette,” he said. “I mean, do you have any questions about Diener?”
Because why would you talk about domestic violence when there’s a game to be played!
I bring this up because the NFL is coming under extraordinary fire for its handling of former Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice. In February, Rice cold-cocked Janay Rice in an elevator. You have doubtless seen the video.
The NFL deserves all the criticism it is getting for its insensitive, incompetent and possibly dishonest handling of the entire Rice fiasco. NFL commissioner Roger Goodell may well lose his job. But the NFL isn’t exactly alone in its apparent indifference to domestic violence. All you have to do is look around this town.
Or how many of you demanded the suspension of Hamed Haddadi after he was charged with assaulting his girlfriend in 2010? I know I did not.
According to the police report, Haddadi’s girlfriend was found bleeding from her head and hand. She had a cut near her right temple, another on her hand, a black eye and bruising around her neck. Haddadi was placed in a one-year diversion program by the court.
Makes the guy a little less worthy of the city’s wild affection, doesn’t it? But the wild affection never stopped.
Another Grizzlies player, James Johnson, was charged with domestic violence in June, after he allegedly choked and struck his wife. Johnson subsequently signed with the Toronto Raptors as a free agent, so Griz fans won’t have to decide whether to temper their ardor when the year starts up again. The charges against Johnson were
dropped when his wife did not show up in court.
But odds are we would have embraced him anyway. That’s what sports fans do. Some Memphians probably still pull for Carolina Panthers defensive lineman Greg Hardy, the former Briarcrest and Ole Miss star who was declared guilty by a judge of assaulting his former girlfriend, pulling her hair, slamming a toilet seat on her arm, and putting his hands around her neck. Hardy appealed and now awaits a jury trial.
Other Memphians may still cherish the memory of Baskerville Holmes, the former Tiger basketball star with the colorful first name. In 1997, Holmes murdered his girlfriend and then turned the gun on himself.
Domestic violence is ugly, it’s deadly and it’s everywhere. It is also tempting to block it out. Or to blame the victim. That happens a lot too. Back when Hunt was arrested, people connected with the program spread the word that his girlfriend brought it on herself. That lasted until Gary Parrish of this newspaper obtained a phone message in which Hunt threatened his girlfriend in advance. Only then did the victimblaming stop.
But all this explains why the Rice fiasco is significant. Because it inevitably changes things well beyond the bounds of the NFL. You think Calipari would get away with the Diener quote if the incident happened today? You think he’d even try?
Leagues will have a harder time shrugging off domestic violence charges. Everyone will have a harder time denying what domestic violence really looks like. And the next time a perpetrator puts on the uniform of a team we happen to love, maybe we’ll respond with something other than a cheer.