Partner shares reader’s secret
Dear Harriette: My boyfriend told his mother one of my biggest secrets. The two of them are very close, but I’m deeply upset with him for repeating something I asked him to never share. I feel deeply betrayed and embarrassed. At first I felt angry enough to consider a breakup, but I’ve since calmed down. Would I be overreacting if I never told him another secret again? What would the correct response be?
— Betrayed
Dear Betrayed: The problem with secrets is that too often that confidence is betrayed. There always seems to be someone to confide in, even when you have promised to keep something to yourself. Witness your boyfriend and his mother. Talk to your boyfriend and make it clear to him how upset you have been about his betrayal. Be sure he understands that this violation of trust makes you question whether it is safe to talk to him about your innermost feelings. Admit that you are doubting whether you can confide in him. Ask him why he chose to share this secret after you explicitly asked him not to.
Ultimately, you will have to weigh each situation to decide what you share with your boyfriend. Whenever you reveal something private to anyone, there is a chance that it will be shared with others. Sometimes it is more important to say it anyway. You will have to decide when the revelation is more important than the secrecy.
Send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
Horoscope GEORGIA NICOLS
KING FEATURES SYNDICATE
Moon Alert: Avoid shopping or making important decisions from 10:45 a.m. to 10:45 p.m. EST today (7:45 a.m. to 7:45 p.m. PST).
Aries (March 21-April 19) ★★★ Today you might learn new information about someone else’s wealth and assets, especially your partner’s. Tonight: Homebound.
Taurus (April 20-May 20) ★★ A discussion with a partner, spouse or close friend is intense today, but the result of this discussion might bring an improvement. Tonight: Listen. Gemini (May 21-June 20) ★★★★ You are in a resourceful frame of mind today, which is why you see ways to introduce improvements to your job or your work. Tonight: Organize your possessions.
Cancer (June 21-July 22) ★★★ Today your love of mystery is heightened. You will love puzzles, whodunit’s, mystery novels and crime TV shows, and be interested in the love life of others. Tonight: You win!
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) ★★★★ Today you want to introduce improvements to your home, especially improvements related to laundry areas, bathrooms, plumbing, recycling and garbage. Tonight: Solitude.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) ★★★ Because your mind is focused in a laser-like way today, not only will you make your point, you also will see the subtext of things around you. Tonight: Be friendly.
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) ★★★★ You might have some excellent moneymaking ideas today. Don’t dismiss them, because they really might be worthy of consideration now or in the future. Tonight: Take charge.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) ★★★ Because you’re in an inventive, resourceful frame of mind today, this means you will see ways to enhance your appearance or improve your immediate environment. Tonight: Explore!
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) ★★ Tread carefully, because most of today is a Moon Alert, which is actually a wonderful time for creative activities but a poor time to make practical decisions. Tonight: Pay bills.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) ★★★ Enjoy conversations with others, because people will be frank and honest with each other. Tonight: Cooperate.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) ★★ A discussion with a parent, boss, the police or someone in authority will be powerful today. Tonight: Work.
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20) ★★★★ Today you’re interested in travel plans, encounters with people from other cultures, as well as a chance for a bit of adventure — something fresh and different! Tonight: Socialize!