How to address and prevent dating violence among young people
Springtime brings images of new growth, flowers in bloom, baby critters being born and sometimes new dating relationships too. As a program manager at the Tennessee Coalition to End Domestic and Sexual Violence, I know not everyone experiences a safe and nurturing relationship with their partner. This issue affects people of all ages, genders, sexual orientations and backgrounds. There's no better time to take steps to address and prevent dating violence than during spring, when hope is in the air and new things are beginning.
The signs of intimate partner violence are not always clear, but there are some common red flags. These include constant texting or phone calls, possessiveness, jealousy, isolation from friends and family, hurtful language that is then played off as a “joke” and other warning signs. These are damaging enough on their own and can often escalate to more extreme forms of abuse. It is important to pay attention to these signs and take action if you suspect someone you know is in an abusive relationship.
At the coalition, we hear firsthand from students about the hold an unhealthy relationship can have over their lives. Often young people tell us they recognize a friend is in a dangerous relationship but simply don't know what to do about it. That's why the coalition created the Be The Friend social media awareness campaign.
We've created more than a dozen videos for Tiktok, Snapchat and Youtube to educate young people about the signs of dating violence and provide them with strategies to help friends get out of abusive relationships. The campaign also emphasizes the importance of bystander intervention, which involves stepping in when you see or suspect that someone is experiencing abuse. This can be as simple as checking in on a friend or offering to accompany them to seek help. Many survivors tell us their friends who encouraged them, supported them and listened to them were the most helpful factor in them choosing to leave their abusive relationships.
It is crucial that we support survivors of intimate partner violence and create a culture that promotes healthy relationships. While the responsibility to end violence is on perpetrators to not abuse others, we can all play a role in working to create safer communities. Knowing the warning signs of abuse and knowing how to support those we love is a great place to start.
The Tennessee Coalition to End Domestic and Sexual Violence is a nonprofit organization that provides support, advocacy and education for survivors of domestic and sexual violence. Learn more at: http://tncoalition.org. The Be The Friend campaign provides information on how to recognize the signs of intimate partner violence and offers resources and support for those who are experiencing abuse. Learn more at: https://bethefriend.org. If you or someone you know needs help, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 for anyone in need of assistance or information and can be reached at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
Samantha Strader is program manager for the Tennessee Coalition to End Domestic and Sexual Violence.