DON’T GIVE UP ON GOING OUT TO DINNER WITH KIDS
Taking kids to dinner isn’t always easy, but don’t give up
Dining out should be fun. It should be relaxing and delicious and pleasurable.
But throw young children into the mix and it often is none of those things.
No, it’s not fun to shush preschoolers for an hour straight, getting progressively hoarse, blood pressure long past the danger zone. It’s not relaxing to remind them that no, you do not pretend your chair is a sabertoothed cat attacking a volcano. (How do you even come up with that?) It is not delicious to eat a burger at yet another chain because it is the only spot at which you feel comfortable taking screeching preschoolers who pretend their chairs are sabertoothed cats attacking volcanos.
None of this is pleasurable.
So should parents of young kids give up? Do we throw in the spit-up-covered towel
and resolve ourselves to eight years (maybe more) of stressful, substandard dining experiences?
Well, we could, but considering good food is the only thing getting me through certain days, I’d rather not. So I dug deep into my end-of-the-day depleted energy well, drove many miles and braved playground-less dining rooms with two small children in tow to find the ideal parent/kid dining experience.
Turns out that, much like having it all and work/life balance, it doesn’t exist.
We checked out six suburban spots, where our only criterion was the food. We wanted restaurants cooking food that adults actually want to eat, with kids’ menus that go beyond chicken fingers and macaroni and cheese. I appreciate it when a restaurant gives me the momentary illusion of being a good parent by offering, say, a non-breaded protein with a smattering of veggies on the plate.
Josh Wolkon, owner of the kid- and adult-friendly Steuben’s, agrees.
“Serving a decent and balanced kids’ menu should not be an afterthought,” he said. “Any new parent struggles with getting kids to eat, and often will succumb to the chicken nuggets so the kids will eat something. Our chefs love the challenge of creating food kids will love.”
STEUBEN’S. 7355 Ralston Road, Arvada, 303830-0096 (also in Denver); steubens.com
What it is: A grown-up diner. What could be better for families?
From the adults: I got the mint chocolate boozy milkshake with absinthe and crème de minte ($10). I could have sipped it forever. Our food was fine — nothing to write home about, but there are some decent deals, with the vast majority of the entrees ringing in at under $20.
From the kids: Sam, 4, was thrilled with his grilled cheese and tomato soup ($7). It inspired rhapsodic comments such as, “The soup was hot, but now it’s not hot.”
Austen, 6, ordered the brown sugar chicken with broccoli ($8). All of the kid meals come with berries (the first thing to be devoured), a drink, veggies with Ranch dipping sauce and an ice cream dessert. “There are so many different shades of green,” she observed. Green equals healthy, right?
Parental stress rating:
Minimal. In fact, if you’re at the Arvada Steuben’s and you don’t have kids, you’re in the minority.
CHANG THAI. 155 Nickel St., Broomfield, 303-4649888; changthairestaurants.com
What it is: Bare-bones, authentic Thai restaurant in an easy-to-miss location.
From the adults: This is my go-to for curry, as chef Jaruwan “Tong” Corazza makes it just like she would in Surin, the northeastern province in Thailand where she was born and occasionally goes back to visit.
From the kids: Sam and Austen are big fans of Corazza’s kids’ menu of pad thai, thai fried rice, and their very favorite dish, pad see-ew ($5). None of these are exclusively kid items. They are all taken from the regular menu, which makes perfect sense because why shouldn’t kids and adults eat the same thing for dinner?
Sam’s pad thai rating: “16!” (I’m unsure of his numeric rating system, but I think that’s good.)
“I like it because the noodles are fat,” Austen said of her pad see-ew. Fair enough.
Parental stress rating:
So-so. It can take a really long time for the food to arrive, but the atmosphere isn’t exactly white tablecloth, so it’s not so bad if things get a little loud. Also, Corazza’s young daughter is sometimes hanging out, so there’s built-in friend entertainment for the kids.
KACHINA SOUTHWESTERN GRILL. 10600 Westminster Blvd., Westminster, 303-410-5813; kachinawestminster.com
What it is: A Southwestern restaurant with a more adventurous menu than you’d expect from a hotel eatery. (It’s inside The Westin Westminster.)
From the adults: I loved my fry bread tacos with their slightly sweet, toothsome shells. The Mojave Navajo taco, with duck confit, pickled cactus, chipotle agave and manchego, is not something you’ll find on most menus. The bright magenta prickly pixie margarita ($10) probably helped with my enjoyment.
From the kids: Sam ordered the quesadilla with jack and cheddar cheeses, and Austen got braised beef Navajo tacos ($7). Both came with sopapillas for dessert.
Austen wasn’t a fan of the fry bread. “The bread is squishy and hard to chew. I don’t like it that much.” Upon stealing some of the pico de gallo that came with Sam’s quesadillas, Austen got a horrified look on her face. “It’s making my mouth scream!” she shouted. I try the pico; yep, definitely some spice in there.
Sam was a big fan of his quesadilla, double fisting his cheesy triangles. As for the sopapillas, his comments were very insightful: “Every one of my birthdays we have to go to Chuck E. Cheese.” And then he proceeded to lick his plate.
Parental stress rating:
Lower than expected. The restaurant is loud enough that it doesn’t matter if someone lets out the occasional shriek. And there are painted cow skulls on the walls to entertain and delight.
MASALAA. 3140 S. Parker Road, Aurora, 303-7556272; masalaausa.com
What it is: An all-vegetarian Indian restaurant with a lunch buffet.
From the adults: I’ve eaten a lot of Indian buffets in my time, and Masalaa’s weekend lunch buffet ($11.95) was not one of my favorites. I didn’t mind that it’s meat-free, but more spice would have been nice.
From the kids: Sam ordered the poori bhajinew ($5.95), which was a trio of fried puffy breads with potatoes and carrots. “I love mine. The puffy bread is really good,” he said. That love didn’t apply to the non-bread portion of his meal, which he didn’t touch.
Austen got the Micky (sic) dosa ($4.95), which was a Mickey Mouseshaped dosa (crepe made of rice and lentil flour) served with three little dipping sauces. “When I first saw this I was like, ‘Whoa, this is huge.’ My favorite sauce is the one that tastes like nothing.” She says she’s full after just eating the dosa’s ears.
Parental stress rating:
When it comes to kids, different can be stressful. They’re not always eager to try new foods, and when you combine that discomfort with a very quiet restaurant, the result isn’t exactly a carefree dining experience.
THE LOST CAJUN. 5350 S. Santa Fe Drive, Littleton, 720-535-8862 (and various locations); thelostcajun.com
What it is: A Coloradobased mini chain serving up gumbo, po’boys, fried oysters, beignets and anything else you’d expect to get in Louisiana.
From the adults: The hush puppies and beignets we ordered went fast, which probably doesn’t say much because how could sweetened, fried dough be anything but delicious? My seafood gumbo was good.
From the kids: In spite of being way off in terms of knowing what a catfish actually is, Sam ordered the catfish bites and French fries ($6). He devoured his basket. “I love the French fries. They (the catfish bites) look like granola put together.”
I couldn’t get any comments out of Austen, who had fallen asleep in the car on the way down, about her shrimp spaghetti ($8) outside of, “It’s good.”
Parental stress rating:
Nonexistent. We got the best, most engaged, helpful service that I’ve had at a restaurant in a long time from our server, Cody. He brought out a platter of gumbos and soups for us to try almost as soon as we sat down, and he was incredibly patient and kind to the kids. If we lived closer, this would be a frequent go-to.
PUNCH BOWL SOCIAL STAPLETON. 3120 N. Uinta St., Denver, 720-5003788 (another location on Broadway); punchbowlsocial.com
What it is: A grown-up arcade, filled with games, karaoke and better food and drinks than at other, less-cool grown-up arcades.
From the adults: We were excited to try celebrity chef Hugh Acheson’s menu. (Acheson is the PBS culinary adviser.) The cheeseburger ($13) and Cubano sandwich ($13) didn’t disappoint, and we were all impressed by the food. We weren’t as impressed by the service, however. We had to fight over a single menu for our table of six, and our seating situation was slightly treacherous. Although the ground level of the restaurant has several booths, we were seated at a high-top table (or rather two hightops pushed together) at the upstairs bar. The young hostess assured us that everything was very childfriendly, but try telling that to a 4-year-old teetering on a backless barstool.
From the kids: Sam ordered the banana almond butter sandwich ($6), which is not surprising because the kid could eat PB&J for every meal. His take on Acheson’s version? “It’s not as good as the peanut butter and jelly I have at home.”
Austen treated herself to the lemon waffles with berries and honey whipped yogurt ($6), which went real quick. “It’s good. It’s sweet. The best part is the waffles.”
Parental stress rating:
Punch Bowl Social’s demographic seems to be single millennials, and so, yes, there were pingpong balls coming at my head and a giant Jenga collapsing and scaring the heck out of me every four minutes. But the rogue balls were sent flying by bearded hipsters, not 5-year-olds. Plus, nearly all of the games cost extra money, and my willingness to pay premium prices for a preschooler to chase around a pingpong ball is very low.