Remembering the fallen on Memorial Day
As Memorial Day approaches, I find myself thinking of Staff Sergeant Jose Caraballo Pietri, Sergeant Alexander Alcantara, and numerous others who are no longer with us. Caraballo was killed by small arms fire in Afghanistan in 2011 while Alcantara lost the war at home. The sad reality for Iraq and Afghanistan veterans is that the vast majority of us have lost more of our brothers and sisters in arms to the war at home, than we have to combat.
When The Global War on Terrorism started in 2001, the average number of veteran suicides per day sat at 19. The following year, that number had jumped to 22, where it was reported to be ‘the’ number for years after. While correlation doesn’t equal causation, a jump of three per day after the start of major combat operations seems more than coincidental. This is in addition to, on average, one active duty service member per day taking their own life.
The number 22 is an one that most people can easily picture in their head, as its the number of players on a football field during any play. These are veterans of all ages included in that number be it WWII through The Global War on Terrorism. I want to focus on the three to four a day though that are my my generation of veterans. The total cost in lives of those killed in service to their country during The Global War on Terrorism are just under 7,100. The cost in lives via suicide and an epidemic in my generation, dwarf those killed in combat.
The math is simple, and shocking, but its deceiving as its only three veterans taking their life per day. The math goes something like this. 365 days a year, multiplied by three suicides a day, multiplied by the number of years the Global War on Terrorism was being waged. That would mean with an average of three per day that 21,900 veterans of the Global War on Terrorism have taken their own lives. But, we can’t forget the one active duty member per day either, which brings the total to 29,200, a large percentage of whom would have also deployed during their time in service. While I’m just a reporter, a recent joint study by the Watson Institute of International & Public Affairs at Brown University and the Frederick S. Pardee Center for the Study of the Long-Range Future at Boston University estimates that 30,177 active duty and veterans of the Global War on Terrorism have died by suicide.
The Facebook postings are almost always the same, ‘Hey guys, we lost….’, or ‘I just wanted to let you know…’, or any other variation of loss. Inevitably the disbelief that it happened sets in, and you’ll find the comment section full of memories about who they were as a person. Comments like, ‘Hey do you remember when…” or ‘That one time we were…’, are common place. There can also be a sense of guilt as well.
Did I do everything I could to help them? Did I reach out enough? Did I make myself available? Why didn’t they call someone, or talk about their problems? We’re family, don’t they realize that? All sorts of questions can be posed, and none can be answered except by the person who is no longer with us. Those unanswered questions sting, because the desire to know why, can never be answered.
I would urge you, the reader, to take action if you know a veteran who is in crisis, or if you yourself are a veteran in crisis. Talk to them, be their sounding board, or if needed, call someone who can get them the help they may not realize they need. I’ve lost too many friends, too many who survived war who didn’t survive the war at home. Veterans can be a stubborn bunch, but while they may act like Superman and seem invincible, they’re human too.