ASK AMY

The Fresno Bee (Sunday) - - Life - Con­tact Amy via email: ask [email protected]­dick­in­son.com.

DEAR AMY: I am a 57year-old man dat­ing a 49-year-old woman. We’ve been to­gether for over a year. She is beau­ti­ful, smart, sexy, and fun. How­ever, she never puts her phone down.

No mat­ter what we are do­ing or where we are, she is tex­ting with her teenage chil­dren, no mat­ter how se­ri­ous or in­con­se­quen­tial the is­sue is.

She will sit in a dark movie theater and text her son about where his shoes are, or an­swer ques­tions that could def­i­nitely wait.

She says she has three kids and has to be avail­able to them al­ways.

To make it even more com­pli­cated, she plays on­line games and thinks noth­ing of whip­ping out her phone in a nice restau­rant as I sit there hu­mil­i­ated while wait­resses look at me with pity.

She says I am old-fash- ioned and that this is nor­mal be­hav­ior. Is it?

Old-fash­ioned Guy

DEAR OLD-FASH­IONED: Let’s grant your gal her ob­ses­sion with her kids’ shoes. If she is an in­volved mom then I’d say she should get a pass to com­mu­ni­cate with them, al­though she seems to do so to a ridicu­lous de­gree. (But no tex­ting in the movie theater, Mom!)

Now, why is she play­ing Candy Crush at din­ner? Do you con­front her about her in­tol­er­a­ble rude­ness? And if not – why not?

You are a fel­low adult. You have feel­ings. You don’t like be­ing ig­nored, dis­counted and then told that your feel­ings are less im­por­tant than her game.

Frankly, she doesn’t seem that into you.

I hope that ul­ti­mately you will choose to be with some­one who makes you feel wanted, im­por­tant and worth it. DEAR AMY: This seems petty, but ev­ery af­ter­noon I go to my pub­lic li­brary to pick out books, do a lit­tle work and en­joy the at­mos­phere. This li­brary is lovely and his­toric

Lately there is a group of chil­dren who come to the li­brary after school and are given ac­cess to a (mon­i­tored) com­puter, and they play a game that has ver­bal prompts and var­i­ous noises.

Amy, it is like nails on a black­board. Is there any­thing I can do?

Li­brary Lover

DEAR LOVER: Li­braries are chang­ing to be more like com­mu­nity cen­ters.

Ask your li­brar­ian if there are des­ig­nated quiet times or quiet spa­ces where si­lence will rule, and bring along some noise-can­cel­ing head­phones to wear.

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