The Fresno Bee (Sunday) - - Life - This col­umn is based on the words and writ­ings of the late Rev. Billy Gra­ham.

Q: Q:My hus­band of 30 years has asked for a di­vorce now that our chil­dren are grown and gone. It seems we don’t have a lot in com­mon any­more and I think he is ready for a new life. Will I show him that I love him more by agree­ing to this or should I pray that he will change his mind? – D.V.

A: A:To­day mar­riage vows have dras­ti­cally changed, but for those who have been mar­ried a long time, most cou­ples made the vow “un­til death us do part;” not “un­til di­vorce us do part.”

Trag­i­cally, mar­riages are fall­ing apart at an un­prece­dented rate, and few even think about the vow they took be­fore God when they sign the fi­nal pa­pers declar­ing the mar­riage dead.

Love has been re­de­fined by Hol­ly­wood and ev­ery other en­ter­tain­ment out­let as a way to sat­isfy phys­i­cal de­sires and feel­ings.

But the Bi­ble de­fines love as it was meant to be – beau­ti­ful and loyal. Read 1 Corinthi­ans 13, known as the great love chap­ter, and learn how pleas­ing it is to love the way Christ com­mands.

Gar­dens don’t grow by them­selves; they need to be tended and cul­ti­vated and weeded. The same is true of a mar­riage. A good mar­riage of­ten con­sists of two good for­givers.

We must fight for our mar­riages through love, ma­tu­rity and self­less­ness. Mar­riage has its dif­fi­cult mo­ments: per­son­al­ity dif­fer­ences, life’s pres­sures, mis­un­der­stand­ings, etc., but when two peo­ple are com­mit­ted to one an­other and to God, He will give guid­ance and wis­dom. He can reignite love. The Bi­ble says, “A three­fold cord is not quickly bro­ken” (Ec­cle­si­astes 4:12). Make Christ the cen­ter of your mar­riage.

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