What Ivanka and Jared’s 10th anniversary can teach us all about relationships
Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner are so cute it is criminal. Despite their hectic grifting schedules, the dedicated public servants always make time for each other. Over the weekend, they celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary with a party at Camp David, the president’s country retreat. White House officials have assured us that the bash was paid for by the happy couple and definitely not US taxpayers. Donald Trump has chimed in to say that he funded the celebration, so we can rest assured that no public money was wasted. Not that the Trump/Kushners would dream of using the presidency for personal gain, of course.
It is not clear why Javanka settled on Camp David. After all, the Trumps have a range of hotels at their disposal that, we have been told, are far superior. Trump even tried to host the next G7 summit at his golf course in Doral, near Miami, rather than the mountain hideaway; a White House official justified this by saying Camp David is “miserable” and “way too small”. But perhaps Ivanka has learned that size doesn’t matter. Or maybe Doral was experiencing another bedbug outbreak. Trump’s Mar-a-Lago resort in Palm Beach has also racked up a few healthcode violations, such as the “accumulation of black/green mould-like substance” in an ice machine, which may have made it less than tempting.
There were no paparazzi at the party, so we know little about what went down, but one imagines the pair were showered with gifts from the rich and powerful. Perfume from Putin, perhaps? Steak knives from Jared’s buddy
Mohammed bin Salman? A golden shower head from their Russian business partners? A job as head of the World Bank from Papa? But the real gift is a decade of blissful marriage. Think what you like about Javanka; the pair seem besotted with each other. In many ways, they are a valuable case study on what makes a relationship work.
First, it is important to be with someone who supports your goals. Ivanka has gushed about the fact that the pair are equally ambitious. “I’m happy for him when he is in the office working late,” she told New York Magazine in 2009. “I know how good that feels when you sit down and return emails.” I know what she means. When I sit down late at night and press that little “reply” button, I get a rush of euphoria.
Also critical is ensuring you are clear on your roles. In a 2015 Vogue interview, Jared noted that Ivanka is “the CEO of our household, whereas I’m more on the board of directors”. That may not sound romantic, but it is extremely practical. In fact, I am going to use that line to get out of doing the washing-up. “Sweetie, as CEO of this apartment, the dishes fall under your domain. As executive chairwoman, I simply advise on optimal soap placement.”
Healthy relationships are about compromise, too. If Michael Wolff’s Fire and Fury is to be believed, the couple have made a deal that, once Daddy is out of office, Ivanka gets first dibs at being president. Which is big of Jared, really; people may accuse his property companies of being morally bankrupt slumlords, but at least he is a feminist! And it is not just women’s empowerment on which the two agree; they share strong family values. They are both keen on nepotism.
So, good luck to the couple. They deserve each other. May their 11th anniversary be just as wonderful. I believe the traditional gift is steel, isn’t it? Perhaps their next venue can be somewhere with steel bars.
•Arwa Mahdawi is a Guardian columnist