Fiddly brollies, be gone! There’s a better way to stay stylishly dry
Every morning, after I’ve made tea and fed the dog, I pick up my phone in search of wardrobe inspiration. Ignoring Instagram and Vogue Runway, I open Dark Sky, the weather app, which tells you exactly if, when and how hard it will rain, on your street. Then, and only then, do I think about what to wear.
As far as fashion goes, whether or not it’s sunny doesn’t matter. Even the temperature isn’t a dealbreaker – by this time of year you are wearing warm socks and you grab your coat whenever you leave the house. If it’s colder than you thought when you step outside, that would be when you run back in and get your gloves.
But rain? Rain can ruin everything. You can be wearing the chicest, cosiest, warmest outfit in the world, but if it’s not waterproof and you get caught in a downpour, your look is done for.
I know what you are thinking, but no, an umbrella is not always the answer. Not only is it the most antisocial object in existence – one person’s protective canopy, everyone else at the bus stop’s risk of serious eye injury – it is also a practical no-no, since that alluringly lightweight telescopic umbrella will undoubtedly buckle and turn inside out at the first gust of wind. The mini umbrella is the winter equivalent of the disposable barbecue.
There is a different breed of umbrella, of course, one sturdy enough to last for years. But those are larger, and now that wallets have shrunk to cardholders, our handbags have mostly been downsized accordingly. Maybe you are able to carry an umbrella that doesn’t fit in your bag or coat pocket and get back home at the end of the day without having left it on the train or at the supermarket self-checkout. If so, hats off to you, but I know my limits.
Rainwear – much like that other pressing matter of fashion practicality, pockets – tends to be discriminatory against women. Rain is more of an issue the more hair you have, for a start. Also, men’s coats are more likely to have useful hoods, whereas women’s coats seldom do – and if they do, they are either infantilisingly enormous (Paddington Bear is categorically not a cute look for a grown woman) or mean little things that barely reach your forehead, leaving you with a damp hairline and mascara drips on your cheeks.
A beanie looks great on some people, and fits in a coat pocket. But the way that people cross the street to avoid me when I wear one suggests that it’s not a great vibe on me. Plus they get soggy.
I have had modestly successful experiments with those standalone hoods that you tuck into the collar of your coat. The idea is that it is like having a hoodie layered under smarter outerwear – a much more contemporary, streetstyle-influencer vibe than an umbrella or an anorak – without the bulk of actually wearing the hoodie. (Cos does a Mock Hood for £59 in navy, pink or black padded polyester.) These are useful, but there is something a bit fake about them, like an old-fashioned dickie collar, that stops them from feeling entirely chic.
So I have high hopes for L’hood, the brainchild of hair stylist Elliot Taylor, who has come up with a contemporary version of the plastic bonnet your gran might have worn to protect her perm on the way home from the salon.
The Ritza style (£49.99) has an elongated profile (hard to describe, but imagine if Cristóbal Balenciaga had made bucket hats) and rolls up into a band that you can wear around your wrist like a scrunchie.
Imagine if, like a pair of sunglasses on a sunny day, there was a practical solution to a rainy day that made your look more stylish, not less. I can dream, right? Don’t rain on my parade.
Model: Shazeeda at Body London. Hair and makeup: Sophie Higginson using Ouai and Dior Forever Foundation. Jumper: jigsaw. Rain hood: l-’hood
L’hood is a modern version of the plastic bonnet your gran might have worn to protect her perm