On why we should make Cornhole a new national sport
Once upon a time, I was channel surfing, (at least that’s what we called it when we all had remotes), when I came upon a televised ESPN World Championship of… wait for it, Cornhole. It was a bright sunny Sunday morning and there was nothing on the news, so Bill and I watched a few rounds of Cornhole. There were two on a team and a box near each side with grass in between. Amazingly this simple little game had hit the big time. Four years ago, before the pandemic (don’t you just love that word?), our younger son, Tom, set up a cornhole game in his front yard. We played a few games, winning with the right toss, and swearing in defeat. No profanity. We make up our own.
Summer was gone and so was cornhole. How did it become a coast-tocoast fad?
According to Google, it was invented in the 14th century by a cabinet maker, Mattias Kuepermann, who watched kids toss rocks into groundhog holes. He was concerned the kids might get bit by said groundhogs getting the rocks back, so Mattias built a cabinet to toss rocks into. Fact or Fiction?
The next history takes us to Cincinnati about 15 years ago. Overactive youngsters would toss corn cob ears at one another after BBQS in the back yard. All Midwestern folks claim it was their idea to toss them into a hole, but was it? They decided there was too much butter still on the cobs, making a mess, and a bright farmwife made bags filled with beans to toss. Fact or Fiction?
That Sunday morning we were mesmerized as the sports reporters in suits and headphones commented on the pitches, their graceful movement and the strategy of pushing another guys bag into the hole by accident. The enthusiasm was contagious. The players had colors and cute names. As they limbered up you would believe they were going to toss a caber like in the Highland Games of Scotland. Now a caber is a telephone pole and a bean bag must weigh as much as a Big Mac. However, technique is everything. I had missed the scoring and hoping it was not as confusing as the British Cricket. That game looks a little like baseball, but not really. During commercials they explained that pubs and bars are supporting Cornhole. They sponsor tournaments and purchase special boards with their logos on them. Cornhole games are now part of weddings? I guess the bride and groom toss their bouquet and garter into the cornhole. Fact or Fiction?
Harrah’s Cherokee Casino Resort in North Carolina hosted a “Championship for the Bags.” Five days of play and a $50,000 cash prize! Get me some Cornholes! According to the news, the Casino games were televised and had more viewers than the Tour de France that weekend. Well, I can say truthfully as a real American, I would rather see healthy happy farm and ranch kids wearing red, white and blue, toss bags than a bunch of bike guys in spandex.
How about our state? Here is a call Edgewood, Moriarty, Estancia valley and the East Mountains. Let’s go Cornhole! We can get teams, practice and maybe raise money to help feed the animals at Wildlife West. We can start with Schwebach’s corn. Buy it and start practicing with the corn cobs and then use Hatch chile to fill in the bags. I can see our boards with a hole and painted with roadrunners and coyotes. We can write songs: “Rock and Hole Forever.”
Let me know if you agree with me at donaldduckjo@gmail.com. Roaring Mouse, practicing my pitch… out.