Woman’s second marriage gets cold shoulder

DEAR ABBY » I left a manipulative and abusive marriage after 18 years. My parents fully supported my decision. When I became engaged to the wonderful man who is now my husband, my mother and many other family members told me that second weddings were “not important” and I should have just gone to the courthouse.

I had a very small wedding. All totaled we received five gifts. I didn’t expect anything and was grateful for what we got, but the assumption that this marriage wasn’t important because it is my second hurt me very much. Am I wrong for being so deeply hurt?

— Happier Now in the South

DEAR HAPPIER » I can understand why you would be hurt and offended by what your mother said. In fact, it was so tactless I cannot help but wonder if it was calculated to hurt. If this is typical of her, it may be time to reevaluate your relationship, protect yourself and step back.

DEAR ABBY » The other night I had to go to the ER for severe knee pain. After being seen and released, I called my son to come and pick me up. It was 11:30 at night. Neither he nor my daughter-in-law answered the phone! The next day, his wife told me they have full-time jobs. My grandson said his mom isn’t mad at me, but I feel so hurt. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. — No Response in Virginia

DEAR NO RESPONSE » This unfortunate event should be a lesson for the future. Have a talk with your son and daughter-in-law. The three of you need to come to an understanding about what should happen in the event you have a medical emergency.