Parent needs ideas for COVID Halloween

DEAR HARRIETTE >> I have two young children who are longing to go trickor-treating for Halloween. I have told them no. It’s COVID-19 time. I think it would be crazy to let them go door-to- door taking candy from people. That seems like a surefire superspreader to me.

They are so sad about this. I want to do something but don’t have any ideas. What do you recommend?

— No Halloween

DEAR NO HALLOWEEN >> Why not host a small gathering outside — in your backyard or another private area — where you allow your children to invite a few friends? The group should be no more than 10 children. All children should wear masks the entire time, which shouldn’t be hard since children wear masks on Halloween anyway.

Do not serve food. That would require the children to take off their masks. Host a few games that allow them to play safely at a distance but with each other, like individual relays or charades.

Provide prepackaged candy bags for each child so that they are not grabbing into the same containers repeatedly.

They will appreciate this revised way of getting dressed up and being part of this fun experience while staying as safe as possible.

DEAR HARRIETTE >> I suspect that my husband is either having an affair or about to. There’s a woman he talks about a little too much, and it’s making me nervous.

We have been married for a long time, but our life is pretty boring. We haven’t been intimate in ages. I imagine that this woman seems exciting by comparison to me.

I don’t want to lose my husband. I don’t think accusing him of infidelity will help us any, either, although I have half a mind to chew him out for what I think he may have already done.

What do you advise to rekindle my marriage?

— Want Him Back

DEAR WANT HIM HACK >> When I first got married, I talked to a woman who had been married for more than 20 years. She told me that one of her secrets for a successful marriage is that she and her husband have a standing Friday night date, no matter what. Sometimes they go out; other times they stay at home. But they always do something together.

Sit down with your husband and tell him that you want to refresh your commitment to each other. Point out that you know you two have fallen into a routine that is pretty boring.

Invite your husband to date you again. Think of fun things you can do that you both enjoy. Turn the TV off and talk to each other. Tell your husband that you love him and that you want to work together to ensure that the next days and months are filled with moments that you both genuinely enjoy.

The approach of reclaiming your marriage and being willing to fight for it will likely work better than accusing him of adultery and providing him with an ultimatum.

If he chooses not to engage in your recommendation, ask him to tell you why. If he continues to be withdrawn from you, then ask him if he wants to stay married to you and if he is seeing someone else. Good luck.