Pandemic exacerbates anxiety of parenting in poverty

For parents living in poverty, “diaper math” is a familiar and distressingly pressing daily calculation. Babies in the U.S. go through six to 10 disposable diapers a day, at an average cost of $70 to $80 a month. Name-brand diapers can result in upwards of $120 a month in expenses.

One in every three American families cannot afford enough diapers to keep their infants and toddlers clean, dry and healthy, according to the National Diaper Bank Network. For many parents, that leads to wrenching choices: diapers, food or rent?

The COVID-19 pandemic has exacerbated the situation, both by expanding unemployment rolls and by causing supply chain disruptions that have triggered higher prices for many products, including diapers. Diaper banks — community-funded programs that offer free diapers to low-income families — distributed 86% more diapers on average in 2020 than in 2019, according to the National Diaper Bank Network. In some locations, distribution increased by as much as 800%.

Yet no federal program helps parents pay for this childhood essential.

California is the only state to directly fund diapers for families, but support is limited. CalWORKS, a financial assistance program for families with children, provides $30 a month to help families pay for diapers for kids under age 3. Federal policy shifts also may be in the works: Democratic lawmakers are pushing to include $200 million for diaper distribution in the massive budget reconciliation package.

Low-income parents are left scrambling for ways to get the most use out of each diaper. This stressful undertaking is the subject of an article in American Sociological Review by Jennifer Randles, a professor of sociology at Cal State-Fresno. In 2018, Randles conducted phone interviews with 70 mothers in California. She tried to recruit fathers as well, but only two men responded.

Randles spoke with KHN’s Jenny Gold about how the cost of diapers weighs on low-income moms, and the “inventive mothering” many. The conversation has been edited for length.

Q

How do diapers play into day-to-day anxieties for low-income mothers?

A

In my sample, half of the mothers told me that they worried more about diapers than they worried about food or housing.

I asked mothers, “Can you tell me how many diapers you have on hand right now?” Almost every one told me with exact specificity how many they had — five or seven or 12. And they knew exactly how long that number of diapers would last. … So just all the emotional and cognitive labor that goes into keeping such careful track.

They were worrying, “OK, I’m down to almost my last diaper. What do I do now? Do I go find some cans ? Do I go sell some things in my house? Who in my social network might have some extra cash right now?” I talked to moms who sell blood plasma just to get their infants diapers.

Q

What coping strategies stood out to you?

A

We often call them diaper-stretching strategies. One was leaving on a diaper a little bit longer than someone might otherwise and letting it get completely full.

They would let the baby go diaperless, especially when they were at home. … And they used every household good you can imagine to make makeshift diapers — cloth, sheets and pillowcases. They’re using things that are disposable like paper towels with duct tape. They’re making diapers out of their own period supplies or adult incontinence supplies when they can get a sample.

One of the questions I often get is, “Why don’t they just use cloth?” A lot of the mothers that I spoke with had tried cloth diapers and they found that they were very costand labor-prohibitive. If you pay for a full startup set of cloth diapers, you’re looking at anywhere from $500 to $1,000. And these moms never had that much money. Most of them didn’t have in-home washers and dryers. Some of them didn’t even have homes or consistent access to water, and it’s illegal in a lot of laundromats and public laundry facilities to wash your old diapers.

Q

You found that many women’s concept of being a good mother is wrapped up in diapering. Why is that?

A

Most of the mothers in my sample went without their own food. They weren’t paying a cellphone bill or buying their own medicine or their own menstrual supplies, as a way of saving diaper money.

I talked to a lot of moms who said, when your baby is hungry, that’s horrible. Obviously, you do everything to prevent that. But there’s something about a diaper that covers this vulnerable part of a very young baby’s body. And being able to do something to meet this human need that we all have, and to maintain dignity and cleanliness.

A lot of the moms had been through the welfare system, and so they’re living in this constant fear . … People can’t necessarily see when your baby’s hungry. But people can see a saggy diaper. That’s going to be one of the things that tags you as a bad mom.

Q

Do you see a clear policy solution to diaper stress?

A

What’s kind of ironic is how much physical, emotional and cognitive labor goes into managing something that society and lawmakers don’t even recognize. Diapers are still not really recognized as a basic need, as evidenced by the fact that they’re still taxed in 35 states.

I think what California is doing is an excellent start.

But there are some states where just the cost of diapers alone would use almost half of the average state TANF benefit for a family of three.

Q

Your body of work on marriage and families is fascinating and unusual. Is there a single animating question behind your research?

A

The common thread is: How do our safety net policies support lowincome families’ parenting goals? … I think of it as a reproductive justice issue. The ability to have a child or to not have a child, and then to parent that child in conditions where the child’s basic needs are met.

My work is trying to get people to think more collectively about having a social responsibility to all families and to each other. No country should have 1 in 3 very young children not having one of their basic needs met.

KHN (Kaiser Health News) is a national newsroom that produces in-depth journalism about health issues. Together with Policy Analysis and Polling, KHN is one of the three major operating programs at KFF (Kaiser Family Foundation). KFF is an endowed nonprofit organization providing information on health issues to the nation.