My daughter has been sidelined despite being the better athlete

Dr. Wallace: I’m a parent, not a teenager, but I have a very talented high school teen who excels in her sport. For some reason — likely nepotism or peer pressure from her friends — our head coach has moved my daughter out of her natural position to allow a player of lesser talent to get the starring role on the team!

This is quite frustrating, and I’ve considered suing the school, but I know that will likely go nowhere and it might hurt my daughter’s experience next year during her senior season on the team.

My girl is good enough to get a scholarship, but now this will be highly unlikely since she won’t be seen by scouts who seek college-level talent. Is there anything I can do about this?

— A Frustrated Parent via email

A frustrated parent: Yes, there might be something you can do. Many sports have what is usually referred to as “travel ball” or something similar to that. This means that teams are formed outside of the actual schools and these teams of outstanding and even elite players set up games and tournaments to showcase the various talents of the players and provide them with a very high level of coaching.

Many of the travel ball coaches were high level players or coaches in their day, and they are very well connected to colleges and recruitment departments in particular. Ask around in your community, do some research and see if you can make arrangements to have your daughter’s remaining time this summer and her school year next season be the most beneficial you can. Good luck to your student-athlete!

Our mom works hard, but does not earn enough

Dr. Wallace: My sister and I live with our mom in a single-parent household. I’m 16 and my sister is 14. Our mom is a great mother who takes really good care of us.

She’s always nice, she speaks to us like we are adults and she does her best to provide for us.

But there is one thing that bothers me. It’s my mom’s job. She works in a small construction office that only has about eight people overall, including the owner. My mom is the absolute heart and soul of that business as she does all of the scheduling, pays all of the bills and even hires all of the other office staff. The company owner literally couldn’t function without her.

Yet when it comes to compensation, this guy pays our mom peanuts! She earns only enough for us to eke out an existence and we are always short on money whenever we need something or want to go somewhere. I offered to get a part-time job, but mom wants me to wait until I’m a senior in high school before I try to go to school and work a few hours too.

How can my sister and I help our mom to get paid what she’s worth?

— Her Eldest Daughter, via email

Her eldest daughter:

Before you attempt to do anything, sit down with your mother one day and ask her how you might be able to help her.

As I see it, there are two paths to financial flexibility for your family, and the first one would be for your mother to stay put at that job and be paid a higher salary.

The second option would be for her to find another similar job that would pay her much more, or at least enough to make a job change worth both the effort and risk.

You could mention to your mother that she could network with her business friends and acquaintances to see what other opportunities are out there that match her skill set.

If she can find one, perhaps she could take this information to her boss to explain that she really needs a higher paying job, and that it would be her preference to stay if her compensation could be raised to match both the current local market and her vast job skills.

When seeking a raise, it’s important to stand up for yourself, but it’s also wise to use subtle, professional leverage while doing so. And it’s also wise to explain in advance that the preference is to remain in the current job as long as the pay rate is not a limiting factor.

In any case, help your mother all you can, but respect her decisions regarding this issue. Be very careful not to overstep your bounds in your zeal to help her. It’s her job and her decision, and you must respect this no matter what path she elects to take from here.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@thegreatestgift. com. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. Copyright 2023 creators.com