‘COVID STOLE MY FRIEND FROM ME’
Honoring friend who died, New Milford woman forms social group
NEW MILFORD — For four years, through tough times and happy occasions, busy days and not so much going on, New Milford resident JoAnn Rodriguez Matos could always rely on a coffee and hiking routine she developed with her friend, Chris Pante.
Pante died in February from COVID-19, at the age of 58.
In her late friend’s memory, Matos created a Coffee & Hiking Social Group, as a way to meet new people to carry on their coffee and hiking tradition.
Through the group, which has garnered over 100 members within the week it opened, Matos said she wants to encourage people to value their time together, since “you never know the last time one will see a person,” said Matos, 59, a mother of three and grandmother of two.
Matos met Pante after their 30-year Danbury High School reunion.
Pante ran the Chris Pante Talk Show on Comcast Cable’s Channel 23, which discussed current events.
He contacted Matos about an autobiography on child abuse that she wrote, called “Hot Peas and Butter: The Children in the Basement,” and asked her for an interview. While Matos wanted to hold off on the interview while she worked on a second book, the pair ended up becoming friends.
“We talked on the telephone and struck a friendship. Then, one day, I asked him, ‘Are you interested in going for a hike with me at Tarrywile Park?’ He said, ‘Sure, I’d love to.’ And that’s where it began,” she said.
Going for coffee before the hike was soon added to their get together.
Over the next four years, the friends would met every few weeks, depending upon their schedules and the weather.
“Chris was the most wonderful person — a stand-up comedian,” Matos said. “But he also had some really strong beliefs. He was very, very much eager to really get to the grassroots of what was going on in the world. We had some really nice discussions.”
The friends got COVID at the same time — in January.
“What struck me was that I survived. I said to him I was always afraid of getting COVID because I had respiratory problems throughout my life as a kid,” said Matos, who is a stay-at-home grandmother. She lost her previous job as an administrative assistant during the pandemic.
“His death broke my heart,” she added. “COVID stole my friend from me.”
She said she frequently reads his text messages and talks to him out loud, and misses him every day.
Through the coffee and hiking group, Matos said she would like to celebrate the lives of those who have been lost to COVID by supporting each other and offering our friendship.
Additionally, she said the group is also about getting to know one’s neighbors and their every day struggles.
“Everyone loves a cup of Joe and a hike, but most of all we need to stay connected and learn about each other on God’s green earth,” she said. “Chris liked to get to the deep roots of a conversation and share that with the world. We walked and we talked and we shared our life stories together. True to his profession, he knew how to get that story out of you and make you feel comfortable in knowing that his intentions made a difference in this world.”
Danbury resident Norman Buzaid was neighbors with Pante and has known him for 30 years.
“Chris was a great guy — always happy go lucky and always helpful whenever I’ve ever needed help around the house, such as moving stuff. He also helped my son and daughter with school and sports,” Buzaid said.
One memory he shared was of Pante always driving home in his convertible “with the top down, in the pouring rain,” he said.
“He was always, always in a good mood,” Buzaid added.
Michael Kaufman, a Ridgefield resident, said he “could not have asked for a better friend,” when referring to Pante, whom he knew for nearly 50 years.
“Chris loved to laugh and always made his family and friends laugh and smile,” said Kaufman, who went to Danbury High School with Pante. “He was a loyal and caring friend to many.”
This is seen in the number of people who had donated to the GoFundMe site created for the Christopher G. Pante Memorial Scholarship Fund at Danbury High School, Kaufman said.
Pante was a New York Mets fan and loved going to the home opener. One of his friends is organizing a group to go to the first home game on April 15.
“I plan on being there to watch the Mets play, share wonderful memories and stories of our friend Chris, and pay tribute to him,” Kaufman said. “We know Chris will be with us in spirit and watching over us. We expect good weather and a Mets win.”
More hikes planned
The coffee and hiking group has already held their first meetup — they met at Dunkin’ Donuts on Exit 12 in New Milford and then went to Harrybrooke Park for a stroll.
“About 10 people came,” Matos said. “We went all the way through Harrybrooke Park where there is running water and a fall, and then we came all the way back. It took a leisurely half hour to 45 minutes.”
Once the nice weather comes, Matos said she expects the group to really take off. She has researched local places to hike, such as Steep Rock Preserve in Washington, and posted those places on the group’s Facebook page.
Additionally, she plans to bring some business to the smaller coffee shops in New Milford by bringing in the group.
She hopes to plan both evening hikes during the week and Sunday hikes at noon.
From Pante’s death, Matos said she has learned not to take people for granted.
“Especially, with COVID, we don’t know how long we truly have. People need to have people to rely upon,” Matos said. “This has been a very lonely and scary pandemic.”