Man wants wife to relive her history
Dear Abby: I am a 44-yearold woman who has been married for three years. We all have a past. Unfortunately, I made mistakes in mine that I foolishly mentioned to my husband when he asked. He is someone who doesn’t let go of things easily.
I had a threesome in my early 20s, which I didn’t think was a big deal because I was young and experimenting with my sexuality. He’s now insisting on my having one with him. What should I do?
Cornered in Louisiana
Dear Cornered: If you’re against the idea, you should refuse. And if he persists with his wacky idea, the only “threesome” you should agree to would involve the two of you and a licensed marriage and family therapist.
Dear Abby: I’m an inmate at the women’s prison. My fiance and I have been together for four years and have four little ones under the age of 4. They are with him.
I am getting mad at him for not writing often or sending photos. I realize he’s busy taking care of the babies, but am I being selfish to think he should make time for me?
Inmate Mom in Nevada
Dear Mom: I am glad you asked. Because you have more time on your hands than he does, spend some of it writing to HIM and the CHILDREN. If you do, it may make your bond with them stronger and bring them closer to you until you are released.
Dear Abby: My husband and I were married 10 years and in our 40s when he passed away three years ago. His wishes were that his ashes be split — half to me, and half to be buried with his mom in another state. I want to go there by myself and take care of it without notifying his family, so I won’t have to go through another “funeral.”
I haven’t spoken to his family members in that state since the funeral. I did speak with his sister — once — during the past year (we live in the same city), when I dropped off some of her family’s things that my husband had. Can I just go and take care of it? Must I inform the family?
Young Widow in New York
Dear Young Widow:
Contact the owners of the cemetery and ask this question. If you do not wish to have “another funeral,” it is, of course, your prerogative, but I doubt you can slip this past them.