Man demeans his wife’s intelligence
Dear Abby: I am a wife and mother in my late 30s. I’m also a registered nurse, beginning a master’s degree. I consider myself an intelligent person, and I did well in college. My husband is also intelligent, and I’m proud of his accomplishments. However, he can be arrogant at times.
Today, I overheard him talking to his boss, whom he told about the master’s program I am starting in a few weeks. He then told his boss he would probably have to write some of my papers for me. I couldn’t believe he said that. I would never have anyone complete my work for me. I found it insulting.
He didn’t know I was home, but I walked into his office as soon as I heard. He looked startled and apologized, but I can’t get over it. I feel so hurt and humiliated. How do I move on?
Accomplished in Ohio
Dear Accomplished: Your husband’s ego may be threatened because you are becoming more accomplished. He may also have been trying to inflate his image in his boss’s eyes by casting you as “the little woman” when you caught him. Regardless of what he may say, your accomplishments speak for themselves. Don’t forget that. As for how to move on, it may depend upon your willingness to forgive him for his frailties.
Dear Abby: My son “Alex” and his girlfriend, “Dee,” lived together for eight years. We were all very close and did lots with my other son and his family.
Alex broke up with Dee two years ago, although they continued talking for some time after. We all hoped they would make up. He was under a lot of stress and suffers from depression and anxiety. He was sorry a month after, but Dee did not want to get back together.
We have stayed in touch. She still skates with my daughter-in-law, and we met for brunch. Dee mentioned she met someone six months ago and it could get serious. This man knows she feels it’s time for marriage and a family. Dee has met his family.
Should I let my son know? I feel Alex needs to move on, and he really hasn’t. I think he still hopes they will be together.
Protective Mom in California
Dear Mom: Dee told you she had met someone because she knew you would deliver the message to your son. If he has put his life on hold, hoping to reunite with her, he deserves to know it isn’t in the cards — so tell him.