Senior care leaders share influence of grandparents in shaping their service
When asked why they sought and have remained in jobs that serve senior citizens, several Oklahoma elder-care leaders credited their grandparents for influencing them to develop the abilities and work ethic they have needed.
Aging advocate Janine McCullough said she went to live with her grandmother when she was a child and her mother faced a lengthy hospitalization.
“I bonded with seniors then and never looked back,” said McCullough, now in her seventh term as president of the Oklahoma Alliance on Aging in Oklahoma City. “I have enjoyed a lifetime of friendships with the elderly; the only logical step was to make them my career.”
‘Valuing the vulnerable’
William Whited, 45, is state nursing home ombudsman, taking over a year ago for Esther Houser, who retired. He’s been in the ombudsman program 13 years. The program advocates for residents in long-term care and helps oversee the quality of state nursing home care.
He said his paternal grandmother “taught me to always respect my elders. She made it clear that if you wanted to succeed in life that you had to treat people with dignity and respect, no matter the circumstances. She was instrumental in why I chose the path of working with older Oklahomans.”
Whited said his step-grandfather “led by example when it came to valuing the vulnerable in our society. He and my grandmother cared for his intellectually disabled children. He was always there for them. I didn’t realize it when I was growing up, but it left an impression on me to value the most vulnerable in our society,” he said.
Whited’s maternal grandparents also provided “a valuable force in my life,” he said.
“As they aged, I witnessed the trials and tribulations they endured. They moved from a Northern state to a Southern state to escape the harsh winters. They bought into a life-care community that helped them remain independent until the day they passed away. They remained in independent living and never needed a nursing home,” Whited said.
“They were fortunate to live their last years in the setting of their choice. Their example of how to remain independent still provides inspiration when I am helping older Oklahomans return to the community from a long-term care facility.”
‘A calling, not a job’
Rebecca A. Moore is executive director of the state nursing home association, now known as the Oklahoma Association of Health Care Providers, a position she has held since 2000.
As a child, she had a grandmother with Parkinson’s disease and a brother with an intellectual disability.
“My caregiving capabilities started early. I learned early on that I wanted to dedicate my life to taking care of those who have difficulties with aging and disabilities,” she said.
“I love what I do. It’s not easy, and there are always challenges. But at the end of the day, I measure the good things that have happened that day, who I have helped, what I have learned. I then make a decision to get up the next day and do it all over again. So for me, elder care is a calling, not a job.”
‘Unselfish acts’
Bill Weaver, director of Daily Living Centers in Oklahoma, said he spent a lot of time in his youth with his grandparents.
While teaching at a Florida community college that offers free tuition to seniors, “I became aware of many of the social problems that aging citizens face on a daily basis and it interested me. Seniors are our living history. Working with those seniors was a pleasure that never left me,” he said.
He and his wife moved to Oklahoma City and started the Daily Living Centers, a program that provides an alternative to nursing home care to individuals and caregivers who need help but don’t need institutional support. Community members can drop off a senior friend or relative who can find activities at what are called Adult Day Health Care facilities.
“Aging seniors have been the ones that have made our whole society what we see today,” Weaver said. “They paid for the schools and universities that trained us. They paid for the roads and defined the world in the wars that threatened to destroy our society. Their unselfish acts of sacrifice help those in our society who need help.”
Shared experiences
Tulsa elder-care leader Carol Carter said, “I did have a very close relationship with my grandparents. I spent a lot of quality time with them. All my grandparents were extremely hard workers, and having lived through the Depression, didn’t believe in buying things on credit. So they worked hard, lived within their means, saved their money and paid cash for nearly everything.”
Joe Ann Vermillion, AARP chapter president from McAlester, worked with her brother and sister to help their mother live at home until she died at age 93.
“Those were some of the best days of our relationship. We talked, laughed, cooked her favorite foods and watched ‘Wheel of Fortune,’ ” Vermillion said.
Nico Gomez, executive officer of the Oklahoma Health Care Authority, called his maternal grandmother Granny and paternal grandfather Abuelo.
“My grandparents influenced me the most by the way they lived and loved others,” Gomez said. “They shared with me their wisdom and hard-scrabble life experiences — which have given me a deep sense of appreciation for what is truly important in life. Their priority was to love other people more than possessions.”
Lance Robertson, aging services director for the state Department of Human Services, has been involved with state seniorcare programs since 1993.
“Having been more or less raised by my grandparents galvanized my commitment to working on behalf of older Oklahomans,” Robertson said.
He said his main goal is to see that “Oklahoma seniors are cared for daily in a compassionate and impactful way.”
A career gerontologist, he was at Oklahoma State University in Stillwater for 12 years, where he co-founded the OSU Gerontology Institute.
More than a paycheck
Senior-care advocate Mary Brinkley said that when she was growing up, she lived in a rural area, and her family’s only close neighbors were the age of her grandparents.
“I spent a lot of time helping the neighbors and learned so much from them. Their wisdom was such a gift. As a young girl, I visited my grandfather in the nursing home and I realized how much the residents appreciated a visitor,” she said.
“When I re-entered the job market after my children were in school, I decided that if I was going to give up a day of my life each day for work, there would have to be more to a job than just earning a paycheck. I really felt I could make a difference in the lives of the elderly,” said Brinkley, executive director of the senior-care program LeadingAge Oklahoma for the past 20 years.
“Part of my challenge is to change the public’s perception of aging. Nursing homes aren’t where a person goes to die, but where they go to live the rest of their life. I am fortunate to work with so many inspiring individuals who are leaders in the long-termcare profession,” she said.